


he was a sk8er boy she said see you l8er boy

by bookybookworm



Series: sk8er bois [1]
Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: Crack, F/F, Group chat, I think?, M/M, Texting, dammit, i dont even know anymore, my second chat fic, texting au, there is a bit of swearing you have been warned, we've hit 10k words... wow
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-20
Updated: 2018-04-12
Packaged: 2018-09-10 16:37:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 35
Words: 16,871
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8924392
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bookybookworm/pseuds/bookybookworm
Summary: pika+chu: hello friendskatsudon-yuri: ummmkatsudon-yuri: what is thispika+chu: this, young yuri, is a group chat





	1. the beginning of the end (of my sanity)

**Author's Note:**

> what the fuck is this  
> see you all in hell goodbye

_**pika+chu** added **katsudon-yuri** , **vitya** , **guay-hong** , **liondelaiglesia** , and **tiger-yuri** to the group_

_**pika+chu** renamed the group **‘he was a sk8er boy she said see you l8er boy’**_

**pika+chu:** hello friends

 **katsudon-yuri:** ummm

 **katsudon-yuri:** what is this

 **pika+chu:** this, young yuri, is a group chat

 **katsudon-yuri:** yeah i know…

 **katsudon-yuri:** also im older than you

 **pika+chu:** r00d

 **liondelaiglesia:** hello friends

 **pika+chu:**  :) :) :)

 **pika+chu:** someone appreciates me

_**tiger-yuri** left the group_

_**pika+chu** added **tiger-yuri** to the group_

**pika+chu:** yuri!!!

 **pika+chu:** you cant leave without saying hello

 **tiger-yuri:** my bad

 **tiger-yuri:** hello

_**tiger-yuri** left the group_

_**pika+chu** added **tiger-yuri** to the group_

**pika+chu:** let me elaborate

 **pika+chu:** you cant leave

 **pika+chu:** stat.

 **tiger-yuri:** fuck you

 **pika+chu:** language

 **tiger-yuri:** youre not my dad you cant tell me what to do

 **katsudon-yuri:** language

 **pika+chu:** your dad has spoken

 **tiger+yuri:**  
    
    
    ....................../´¯/) 
    ....................,/¯../ 
    .................../..../ 
    ............./´¯/'...'/´¯¯`·¸ 
    ........../'/.../..../......./¨¯\ 
    ........('(...´...´.... ¯~/'...') 
    .........\.................'...../ 
    ..........''...\.......... _.·´ 
    ............\..............( 
    ..............\.............\...

 **guay-hong:** what is going on

 **liondelaiglesia:** guang-hong!!! you’re here

 **guay-hong:** yes

 **katsudon-yuri:** pls tell me why you made this phichit

 **pika+chu:** ~~because i want to keep tabs on my fellow skaters~~

 **pika+chu:** because youre all my friends!

 **liondelaiglesia:** ¬_¬

 **pika+chu:** ;))

 **guay-hong:** wheres victor

 **katsudon-yuri:** hes in bed

 **liondelaiglesia:** in your bed ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) 

 **katsudon-yuri:** no wtf

 **vitya:** in_yuris_bed.jpg

 **pika+chu:** sexy times amirite *wiggles eyebrows*

 **katsudon-yuri:** …

 **katsudon-yuri:** victor why are you in my room

 **vitya:** still_in_yuris_bed.jpg

 **liondelaiglesia:** lmaoo he’s patting next to him i think he wants you to join

 **guay-hong:** true

_**katsudon-yuri** left the group_

_**vitya** added **katsudon-yuri** to the group_

**tiger-yuri:** if i cant leave no one can leave

 **pika+chu:** the return of yurio

 **tiger-yuri:** dont

 **tiger-yuri:** fucking

 **tiger-yuri:** call

 **tiger-yuri:** me

 **tiger-yuri:** that

 **katsudon-yuri:** okay yurio

 **vitya:** yuuri you better run

 **vitya:** i can hear yurio smashing things

 **vitya:** why dont you evacuate to your room

 **vitya:** i’ll keep you company ;)

 **tiger-yuri:** dont run away from me you shit head

 **guay-hong:** dont be like that to your father yurio

 **liondelaiglesia:** @guang-hong youre dead m8

 **tiger-yuri:** ogsjlkdf;adkajfLSHDK

 **liondelaiglesia:** it was nice knowing you guang

 **liondelaiglesia:** and yuuri

 **liondelaiglesia:** rip in peace

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> rip yuuri and guang-hong


	2. victuuri becomes canon

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> welcome to the hell that is this fic  
> we dont have cookies

**_‘he was a sk8er boy she said see you l8er boy’_ **

**vitya:** its okay guys i protected yuuri he is safe

 **pika+chu:** ahh my bff is safe

 **pika+chu:** all is right with the world

 **vitya:** no way yuuri is _my_ best friend

 **pika+chu:** ahaha noo victor

 **pika+chu:** youre his boyfriend

 **pika+chu:** theres a difference

 **katsudon-yuri:** NO WTF WE ARENT DATING

 **katsudon-yuri:** but its true victor phichit is my bff

 **pika+chu:** we even have matching bracelets

 **pika+chu:** but dont deny anything katsuki

 **pika+chu:** you guys are dating

 **guay-hong:** [victuuri_kiss.jpg](https://68.media.tumblr.com/cbff0ec95c16e529f3d143f2d08ece60/tumblr_oihysn2SwG1v9ar1no1_540.png)

 **vitya:** ngl that did happen

 **tiger-yuri:** fohlkshg;djlhLJSHGKJSHG’djghS;KGJHFKHGASKJHGLKJFHGLKDJFGLAKJHFLlskfjhdf

 **pika+chu:** someone’s angry

 **tiger-yuri:** 凸

 **katsudon-yuri:** …

 

_private message from **katsudon-yuri** to **vitya**_

**katsudon-yuri:** okay

 **vitya:** ?

 **katsudon-yuri:** are we actually dating

 **katsudon-yuri:** or was that kiss platonic

 **vitya:** when have you ever heard of a platonic kiss?

 **katsudon-yuri:** oh

 **vitya:** ;)

 **katsudon-yuri:** i dont know if you know this or not but i am really dense

 **vitya:** i do

 **katsudon-yuri:** so youre going to have to spell this out for me

 **vitya:** okay

 **vitya:** do you want to date?

 **katsudon-yuri:** um.

 **katsudon-yuri:** only if you want to

 **vitya:** i do

 **katsudon-yuri:** then

 **vitya:** we’re dating now!

 **vitya:** okay im coming to your room

 **katsudon-yuri:** wait why

 

**_‘he was a sk8er boy she said see you l8er boy’_ **

**liondelaiglesia:** okay but you know who else is dating

 **pika+chu:** yurio and otabek?

 **tiger-yuri:** what the hell

 **tiger-yuri:** we’re not

 **pika+chu:** mhmhmhmhm sure

 **liondelaiglesia:** okay, i’ll tell you

 **liondelaiglesia:** you don’t have to pester me

 **guay-hong:** we weren’t

 **liondelaiglesia:** stfu “guay”

 **liondelaiglesia:** you know that means cool in Spanish

 **liondelaiglesia:** well you know what

 **liondelaiglesia:** u aren’t cool

 **guay-hong:** rude thing to say to your boyfriend

 **pika+chu:** YOURE DATING????????????????????????????????????????????????????

 **liondelaiglesia:** way to go “guay” you ruined my cool build up

 **guay-hong:** did you mean your guay build up?

 **liondelaiglesia:** stfu

 **tiger-yuri:** ngl most people knew already

 **liondelaiglesia:** !!! i do not believe this

 **pika+chu:** okay but where did yuri and victor go

 **guay-hong:** probs making out

 **tiger-yuri:** ew no

 **pika+chu:** go check yuri

 **tiger-yuri:** you cant tell me what to do

 **pika+chu:** …

 **tiger-yuri:** jeez im going

 **guay-hong:** whats the bet theyre making out

 **liondelaiglesia:** idk yuuri seemed pretty set on the idea they weren’t dating

 **pika+chu:** tru

 **tiger-yuri:** oH MY GOD

 **guay-hong:** what

 **tiger-yuri:** I’M SCARRED

 **tiger-yuri:** kill_me_now.jpg

 **pika+chu:** i am screaming

 **pika+chu:** i am legit screaming

**_pika+chu_ ** _renamed the group **‘victuri is canon’**_

**liondelaiglesia:** that was unexpected

 **guay-hong:** but completely expected

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> guess what they were doing ;))))))))


	3. a lot of things happen including the arrival of christmas (i mean chris)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> lmao thanks for all those comments and stuff  
> also don't get used to this update schedule i've got revision for mocks and also it's hard to be funny

**_‘victuri is canon’_ **

**katsudon-yuri:** hi guys

 **pika+chu:** DID YOU GET WITH VICTOR LAST NIGHT

 **katsudon-yuri:** “get with”?

 **tiger-yuri:** omg katsuki even i know what that means

 **guay-hong:** did u have sex w/ victor

 **katsudon-yuri:** NO!

 **vitya:** ;)))

 **pika+chu:** whats that supposed to mean

 **katsudon-yuri:** yes victor what _is_ that supposed to mean

 **pika+chu:** tbh im still freaking out about victuri being canon

 **guay-hong:** so is leo

 **guay-hong:** he rang me at 4am crying about how victor and yuuri stole his limelight

 **liondelaiglesia:** I diD NOT

 **guay-hong:** sure

 

_private message from **chris(tmas)** to **tiger-yuri**_

**chris(tmas):** I heard you and some of the other skaters are in a group chat.

 **tiger-yuri:** wtf how

 **chris(tmas):** Can I join?

 **tiger-yuri:** ummmm how about no

 **tiger-yuri:** how do you even know my number

 **chris(tmas):** I asked Victor for it.

 **tiger-yuri:** fhjg;jksdafl;shdf im going to kill him

 

**_‘victuri is canon’_ **

**tiger-yuri:** wtf chris just texted me

 **tiger-yuri:** asking to be added to this group chat

 **vitya:** lmao we should add him

 **tiger-yuri:** oh that reminds me victor

 **tiger-yuri:** WHY DID YOU GIVE CRAPBAG MY NUMBER

 **vitya:** he asked for it

 **tiger-yuri:** uiwfdkljasfld;sh

 **liondelaiglesia:** father-son drama?

 **tiger-yuri:** i will stab you

 **pika+chu:** 'crapbag' i love it

**_pika+chu_ ** _added **chris(tmas)** to the group_

**chris(tmas):** Hello!

 **vitya:** hi chris

 **chris(tmas):** Hi Victor!

 **chris(tmas):** Ooh what’s this I see about ‘victuri’?

 **guay-hong:** they’re dating

 **chris(tmas):** Victor Nikiforov and Yuri Plisetsky??? That’s unexpected. Not to mention... illegal?

 **tiger-yuri:** NO WTF

 **katsudon-yuri:** me and victor

**_katsudon-yuri_ ** _renamed the group **‘victuuri is canon’**_

**chris(tmas):** Makes sense.

 **liondelaiglesia:** …

 **guay-hong:** …

 **vitya:** …

 **katsudon-yuri:** …

 **pika+chu:** …

 **liondelaiglesia:** i feel like this chat died after chris entered

 **chris(tmas):** True.

 **pika+chu:** why are u using correct punctuation it ruins the vibe of this sk8er boi chat

 **chris(tmas):** It’s ironic.

 **katsudon-yuri:** …

 **pika+chu:** its really not

 **chris(tmas):** By the way-

 **chris(tmas):** I’m on a plane to Japan to meet family, maybe I can meet Victor, Yuuri and Yuri?

**_tiger-yuri_ ** _left the group_

**pika+chu:** ngl i dont blame him for leaving

 **pika+chu:** but no one leaves the chat

_**pika+chu** added **tiger-yuri** to the group_

_**pika+chu** renamed the group **‘no one leaves the sk8er bois’**_

**tiger-yuri:** fuck you

 **pika+chu:** sorry ive got a bf

 **pika+chu:** so you cant ‘fuck’ me

 **katsudon-yuri:** YOU HAVE A BOYFRIEND???

 **pika+chu:** no it was just for the sake of a joke

 **katsudon-yuri:** good because when you get a bf you have to tell me first

 **pika+chu:** okay dad

 **chris(tmas):** I just realised, Yuuri and Yuri have matching names.

 **tiger-yuri:** fuck

_**tiger-yuri** changed to **thebetteryuri**_

**thebetteryuri:** there we’re not matching

 **vitya:** you should change it to yurio

 **thebetteryuri:** my

 **thebetteryuri:** name

 **thebetteryuri:** is

 **thebetteryuri:** not

 **thebetteryuri:** FUCKING

 **thebetteryuri:** YURIO

 **guay-hong:** but it is?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> who does everyone ship phichit with i need to know  
> and happy winter solstice my friends


	4. phichit takes centre stage (as snow white)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> look i know nothing about hamsters so lets pretend that this is an au where everything is the same except hamsters dont hibernate  
> i just used hamsters as an excuse to use a really cute gif okay

**_‘no one leaves the sk8er bois’_ **

**katsudon-yuri:** phichit tell me why you made this chat again

 **pika+chu:** ngl i was bored

 **pika+chu:** also my hamsters are hibernating

 **thebetteryuri:** hamsters… dont hibernate tho?

 **pika+chu:** umm yes they do they’ve been in their cage for like a week and not moving

 **katsudon-yuri:** phichit no

 **pika+chu:** shit

 **pika+chu:** gtg

 **vitya:** rip phichits hamsters

 **katsudon-yuri:** aw i loved them :(

 **thebetteryuri:** how did phichit not know they dont hibernate

 **katsudon-yuri:** hes only had them for three years

 **katsudon-yuri:** before, he had a cat

 **thebetteryuri:** hamsters don’t even live for three years wtf

 **thebetteryuri:** it’s a miracle they lived that long

 **vitya:** aw vet yurio taking the stage

 **thebetteryuri:** bye

 **pika+chu:** UMM YURIO WHY DID YOU LIE

 **pika+chu:** my hamsters are fine???????????????????????

 **katsudon-yuri:** he left

 **katsudon-yuri:** wait so what were they doing

 **pika+chu:** idk

 **liondelaiglesia:** phichit has magic hamsters

 **guay-hong:** #confirmed

 **katsudon-yuri:** [phichit_snow_white.gif](https://68.media.tumblr.com/b078d39bdf5b356e16d4eff76ba45866/tumblr_oij7h9gFYr1v9ar1no1_500.gif)

 **liondelaiglesia:** aww youre snow white so cute

 **pika+chu:** yes,,,

 **pika+chu:** look at this skin,,, as white as snow

 **katsudon-yuri:** your hair is as black as ebony tho

 **pika+chu:** but are my lips as red as blood

 **pika+chu:** do i have an evil queen as a stepmother who poisons me with an apple

 **pika+chu:** where is my handsome prince?

 **guay-hong:** where are your seven dwarfs

 **katsudon-yuri:** but you are the fairest of them all

 **pika+chu:** aww  <333

 **katsudon-yuri:** <333

 **vitya:** what about me :(

 **katsudon-yuri:** sorry phichit turns out youre not the fairest of them all

 **chris(tmas):** Yes, it’s me.

 **katsudon-yuri:** ¬_¬

 **katsudon-yuri:** i was talking about victor

 **vitya:** aww yuuri (///∇///✿)

 **pika+chu:** katsuki yuuri i thought you loved me

 **katsudon-yuri:** yeaahhhh

 **katsudon-yuri:** but like not in a gay way

 **vitya:** what about me

 **katsudon-yuri:** yeah i like you in a gay way

 **vitya:** nice

 **pika+chu:** you know what katsuki

 **pika+chu:** i dont need you

 **pika+chu:** i have hot korean guys and gals who love me

 **guay-hong:** are you talking about seung-gil lee?

 **pika+chu:** nooo!!!!!!!

 **pika+chu:** [people_who_actually_love_me.jpg](https://68.media.tumblr.com/ada38b75fc73696daf7916a68519cf39/tumblr_oijd2vGBXg1v9ar1no1_540.png)

 **katsudon-yuri:** theyre not real

 **pika+chu:** how dare you

 **thebetteryuri:** ngl mystic messenger is good

 **pika+chu:** OMG YURI YOU PLAY

 **thebetteryuri:** oh god what have i gotten myself into

 **guay-hong:** leo says stop talking

 **vitya:** why

 **guay-hong:** BECAUSE YOURE DISCTRACTING GUANG FROM HANGING OUT WITH ME

 **katsudon-yuri:** was that leo

 **guay-hong:** yes

 **vitya:** oo are you on a date

 **guay-hong:** yes

 **liondelaiglesia:** stfu guys let me have a nice day with my boyfriend

 **thebetteryuri:** thats gay

 **liondelaiglesia:** ur gay

 **thebetteryuri:** that is true

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> everyone was saying that they ship phichit with his phone so why not say he plays mystic messenger aha  
> ALSO I'M NOT READY FOR THE NEW EPISODE TONIGHt!!! NO SPOILERS PLEASE THO I'M GOING TO WATCH IT TOMORROW


	5. literally everything is about otabek. everything

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> who wants to scream with me over ep12  
> i'm dead i was legit crying and i never cry

**_‘no one leaves the sk8er bois’_ **

**pika+chu:** let’s talk about yurios love life

 **thebetteryuri:** lets not

 **pika+chu:** okay so

 **pika+chu:** i think that cheerio likes someone

 **vitya:** ‘cheerio’

 **thebetteryuri:** what the fuck

 **thebetteryuri:** i am not a cereal

 **pika+chu:** OH MY GOD AUTOCORRECT

 **pika+chu:** anyway

 **pika+chu:** yurio likes someone

 **thebetteryuri:** no i don’t

 **katsudon-yuri:** [yurio_and_hisboyfriend.jpg](https://68.media.tumblr.com/5b46584d4f850d75ede8e8bb2bbaa1d1/tumblr_oije92fqfc1v9ar1no1_500.png)

 **pika+chu:** OH MY GOD I WAS JUST JOKING I DIDN’T THINK YOU ACTUALLY LIKED SOMEONE

 **thebetteryuri:** me and otabek aren’t dating!!

 **thebetteryuri:** we’re just friends

 **vitya:** but ur both smiling

 **vitya:** ur on a date

 **thebetteryuri:** okay 1) i am allowed to smile and 2) its not a date

 **katsudon-yuri:** true you did smile at me once

 **katsudon-yuri:** omg

 **katsudon-yuri:** YURIO DO YOU HAVE FEELINGS FOR ME

**_thebetteryuri_ ** _left the group_

**vitya:** he better not have feelings for u

 **katsudon-yuri:** dw victor youre the only one for me

 **vitya:** aww  <3

 **katsudon-yuri:** <3

**_pika+chu_ ** _added **thebetteryuri** to the group_

**liondelaiglesia:** yurio you just missed the sweetest conversation in the world

 **liondelaiglesia:** i now need fillings

 **guay-hong:** i’ve got diabetes now

 **chris(tmas):** Who are those people in the window in that photo?

 **katsudon-yuri:** my sister and ballet teacher

 **chris(tmas):** They’re cute.

 **vitya:** dont chris

 **katsudon-yuri:** its fine theyre crushing on each other

 **katsudon-yuri:** they have no eyes for anyone else

 **pika+chu:** like yurio and otabek ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

 **thebetteryuri:** i will stab you

 **vitya:** i know lets add otabek to this group

 **pika+chu:** yess yurio whats his number

 **thebetteryuri:** as if im telling you

 **guay-hong:** i have his number

 **thebetteryuri:** wait no

**_guay-hong_ ** _added **otabek** to the group_

**pika+chu:** hi otabek welcome to the sk8er bois

 **thebetteryuri:** by ‘sk8er bois’ you mean hell

 **vitya:** hes not replying

 **pika+chu:** he hasnt seen it yet

 **katsudon-yuri:** aw i wanted to talk to yurio’s friend

 **chris(tmas):** Me too~ He looks nice.

 **thebetteryuri:** wtf chris

 **chris(tmas):** He’s hot, I like hot people.

 **otabek:** thanks

 **pika+chu:** he speaketh

 **thebetteryuri:** hi otabek

 **otabek:** hello yuri

 

_private message from **vitya** to **thebetteryuri**_

**vitya:** love is in the air♫

 **thebetteryuri:** no

 

**_‘no one leaves the sk8er bois’_ **

**otabek:** why am i here

 **pika+chu:** i created it so we could all make friends!

 **otabek:** okay

 **katsudon-yuri:** i’m yuuri katsuki, vitya is victor nikiforov, pika+chu is phichit chulanont, guay-hong is guang-hong ji, liondelaiglesia is leo de la iglesia, and chris(tmas) is christophe giacometti

 **katsudon-yuri:** and you know yuri p already

 **otabek:** thank you

 **liondelaiglesia:** that was awesome

 **pika+chu:** sk8er dad

 **vitya:** youre so cute yuuri

 **thebetteryuri:** wtf he just squealed?

 **katsudon-yuri:** oops aha

 **katsudon-yuri:** but victor youre cute too

 **vitya:** aw thanks love

 **katsudon-yuri:** ;)

 **pika+chu:** i need a relationship like victuuri

 **guay-hong:** honestly same

 **liondelaiglesia:** umm guang-hong ji

 **liondelaiglesia:** WHO IS SITTING RIGHT NEXT TO YOU??

 **guay-hong:** you

 **guay-hong:** dw i was just kidding

 **liondelaiglesia:** good

 **guay-hong:**  maybe

 **liondelaiglesia:** ¬_¬

 **otabek:** can i leave

 **otabek:** my phone keeps vibrating

**pika+chu:** no

**pika+chu:** no one leaves

 **katsudon-yuri:** aw lets just keep quiet for now~ don’t want to disturb otabek

 **pika+chu:** sk8er dad strikes again

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yeah none of this sticks to canon, but meh~  
> OKAY BUT THE WHOLE "DAVAI" *THUMBS UP* THING KILLED ME


	6. sk8er family

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay so thanks so much for all the support??? i love you all to bits  
> when i woke up i checked my inbox and??? you were all so amazing??? i'm crying???  
> -  
> and don't worry minami is coming in chapter 7 i keep on putting it off for some reason ahahaaa

**_‘no one leaves the sk8er bois’_ **

**vitya:** if yuuri’s the sk8er dad

 **vitya:** what does that make me

 **pika+chu:** the sk8er granddad

 **liondelaiglesia:** no hes the cool sk8er dad

 **katsudon-yuri:** am i not cool?

 **liondelaiglesia:** cooler*

 **katsudon-yuri:** nice

 **pika+chu:** can i be the sk8er uncle

 **katsudon-yuri:** yess!!

 **katsudon-yuri:** and yurio is the sk8er son

 **thebetteryuri:** no im not

 **vitya:** yes you are now go to your room

 **liondelaiglesia:** me and guang can be the sk8er uncles as well

 **pika+chu:** no youre too young

 **liondelaiglesia:** im 19?? and youre 20???

 **pika+chu:** uncles are only twenty year olds and over my friend

 **pika+chu:** you two are the sk8er cousins who are dating each other

 **katsudon-yuri:** where is guang hong anyway

 **liondelaiglesia:** hes asleep

 **liondelaiglesia:** guang_drools_in_his_sleep.jpg

 **pika+chu:** omfg is he on your shoulder

 **liondelaiglesia:** yeah

 **chris(tmas):** Cute.

 **thebetteryuri:** wait what about otabek

 **vitya:** sk8er son in law

 **thebetteryuri:** shut up

 **otabek:** why am i the son in law

 **thebetteryuri:** you arent

 **katsudon-yuri:** fine otabek is the other sk8er cousin

 **chris(tmas):** Who am I?

 **katsudon-yuri:** that is a question i ask myself everyday

 **katsudon-yuri:** who am i

 **katsudon-yuri:** what is my place in this world

 **chris(tmas):** …

 **chris(tmas):** I mean, who am I in the sk8er bois?

 **thebetteryuri:** the dog

 **liondelaiglesia:** are you saying chris is a furry

 **thebetteryuri:** no

 **thebetteryuri:** im saying hes a dog

 **chris(tmas):** I have no words.

 **katsudon-yuri:** sorry for my son's rudeness chris

 **thebetteryuri:** do you want to die

 

_private message from **otabek** to **thebetteryuri**_

**otabek:** what did victor mean by me being the son in law

 **thebetteryuri:** uh

 **thebetteryuri:** nothing

 **thebetteryuri:** nothing at all

 **thebetteryuri:** he was just joking around

 **otabek:** i don’t get the joke

 **thebetteryuri:** its fine it was lame anyway

 **otabek:** okay…

 **thebetteryuri:** yeah

 

**_‘no one leaves the sk8er bois’_ **

**liondelaiglesia:** victor and otabek you should change your names

 **vitya:** why

 **liondelaiglesia:** because theyre boring

 **vitya:** so is yours???

 **liondelaiglesia:** um, excuse me

 **liondelaiglesia:** leo means lion in latin therefore i am liondelaiglesia

 **vitya:** then what about everyone else

 **pika+chu:** pikachu is a pokemon

 **pika+chu:** chu(lanont) is my last name

 **katsudon-yuri:** katsuki is similar to katsudon and i like katsudon

 **thebetteryuri:** i am the better yuri

 **katsudon-yuri:** okay thats fair

 **katsudon-yuri:** (still hurts tho)

 **chris(tmas):** It’s almost Christmas!!

 **liondelaiglesia:** also for guang ‘guay’ means cool in spanish

 **otabek:** what was the point of explaining your names

 **pika+chu:** probably because the author thought these names were very clever and wanted to show it off to her readers without seeming too ostentatious and proud

 **vitya:** moving on

 **_vitya_ ** _changed to **vincere**_

 **pika+chu:** why that name???

 **vincere:** because the name victor stemmed from the participle of the latin verb “to conquer” which is vincere

 **katsudon-yuri:** but victor vincere is a third conjugation verb and youre not a third youre a first

 **vincere:** aww  <333

 **katsudon-yuri:** <333

 **_vincere_ ** _changed to **vitya**_

 **liondelaiglesia:** so youre not going to change it?

 **katsudon-yuri:** i think its hot and cute anyway  <333

 **vitya:** ly  <33

 **pika+chu:** what about otabek

 **_otabek_ ** _changed to **theotabest**_

 **vitya:** aw thats cute

 **theotabest:** yuri told me to do it

 **thebetteryuri:** stfu

 **katsudon-yuri:** aw youre helping your bf so nice

 **katsudon-yuri:** oops i meant bff haha

 **thebetteryuri:** fuck off

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Friend: please don’t reference latin, not many people will understand  
> Me: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yfj9pkN4nxg  
> Friend: also stop self-inserting it’s not funny  
> Me: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yfj9pkN4nxg 
> 
> ALSO IMPROMPTU SHOUTOUT TO [ROSESANDMOREDANCE](https://archiveofourown.org/users/rosesandmoredance) FOR ALWAYS SUPPORTING SINCE THE VERY BEGINNING AND TELLING ME TO KEEP THE NAME VITYA BECAUSE IT'S "HOT AND CUTE" THANKS


	7. the one where victor and yuuri flirt way too much (but isn't that every chapter?)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> word keeps on changing the proofing language to spanish idk why so if some words are misspelled im sorry  
> And yes, I do know how to use punctuation, it's just that I can't be bothered to use it in the notes and the characters can't be bothered to use punctuation while texting (except Chris).

_private message from **pika+chu** to **katsudon-yuri**_

**pika+chu:** yuuri

 **pika+chu:** can i ask you something

 **katsudon-yuri:** yeah, whats up

 **pika+chu:** are you using protection with victor

 **katsudon-yuri:** phichit!!!!

 **katsudon-yuri:** unnecessary

 **pika+chu:** but are you

 **katsudon-yuri:** we havent gotten that far

 **pika+chu:** yet ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

 **katsudon-yuri:** gdi

 **pika+chu:** you know you love me

 

**_‘no one leaves the sk8er bois’_ **

**guay-hong:** can i add someone to this chat

 **vitya:** who is it

 **guay-hong:** minami kenjiro

 **katsudon-yuri:** aah i competed against him a few times

 **katsudon-yuri:** i think hes a fan

 **vitya:** ‘i think’

 **vitya:** hes obsessed, everyone can see it

 **pika+chu:** yeah, as obsessed as yuuri was with you victor

 **katsudon-yuri:** yeah i was pretty obsessed haha

 **thebetteryuri:** so obsessed that you had victors face plastered all over your walls

 **vitya:** omg yuuri did you

 **katsudon-yuri:** wtf how do you know that yurio

 **thebetteryuri:**  yuko-san told me

 **katsudon-yuri:** :((((

 **vitya:** aw that’s so adorable

 **katsudon-yuri:** im moving back to detroit

 **guay-hong:** so can i add him

 **pika+chu:** sure

**_guay-hong_ ** _added **miniminami** to the group_

**pika+chu:** welcome to the sk8er bois minami

 **miniminami:** hi (✪‿✪)ノ

 **katsudon-yuri:** aww minami youre so cute

 **miniminami:** omg

 **miniminami:** thank you !!!

 **thebetteryuri:** how many people are now in this godforsaken group chat

 **vitya:** he means no offence minami

 **miniminami:** haha that’s fine :)

 **guay-hong:** nine people

 **pika+chu:** and no one can leave

 **katsudon-yuri:** do you know who everyone is minami?

 **miniminami:** yes, I do! wait who is theotabest?

 **theotabest:** otabek altin

 **liondelaiglesia:** sk8er dad strikes again

 **miniminami:** sk8er dad?

 **katsudon-yuri:** me

 **katsudon-yuri:** victor is the other sk8er dad, yurio is the sk8er son, guang-hong, leo and otabek are all sk8er cousins, phichit is the sk8er uncle

 **katsudon-yuri:** who is chris

 **thebetteryuri:** sk8er dog

 **chris(tmas):** I’m really not.

 **thebetteryuri:** sk8er dog

 **chris(tmas):** I feel like no one’s listening to me…

 **liondelaiglesia:** minami can be the older sk8er son

 **miniminami:** ahaa thank you (〃▽〃)

 **pika+chu:** cute

 **miniminami:** ahahaha im blushing

 

_private message from **vitya** to **pika+chu**_

**vitya:** love is in the air♫

 **pika+chu:** nah we’re just friends aha

 

**_‘no one can leave the sk8er bois’_ **

**miniminami:** so what does everyone speak about on this chat

 **pika+chu:** people’s love lives mainly

 **miniminami:** whose?

 **pika+chu:** victuuri (which is canon btw)

 **miniminami:** omg it is??? thats amazing

 **katsudon-yuri:** haha thanks minami

 **pika+chu:** yuri p’s love life

 **thebetteryuri:** IT’S NONEXISTENT

 **vitya:** mhm sure

 **liondelaiglesia:** umm

 **liondelaiglesia:** what about me and guang

 **pika+chu:** yeah sure

 **guay-hong:** get rekt

 **liondelaiglesia:** guang youre in this relationship too

 **pika+chu:** but also my love life with hot korean dudes

 **miniminami:** do you mean seung-gil?

 **pika+chu:** no!!!!!!!!!!!!! !! ! ! ! ! !

 **pika+chu:** im talking about mystic messenger

 **miniminami:** oh its just a game i thought

 **pika+chu:** rage

 **katsudon-yuri:** aw phichit don’t get angry at minami

 **katsudon-yuri:** he’s right its just a game

 **pika+chu:** rage

 **vitya:** more to the point why are you so defensive about seung-gil lee

 **pika+chu:** ahahahahaahaaa im not

 

_private message from **vitya** to **pika+chu**_

**vitya:** love is in the air♫

 **pika+chu:** stop!!! no love here whatsoever. none. nada.

 **vitya:** ;)))

 

**_‘no one leaves the sk8er bois’_ **

**pika+chu:** petition to remove victor

 **katsudon-yuri:** i thought no one leaves the sk8er bois

 **pika+chu:** haha i didn’t mean from this group

 **pika+chu:** i meant from life.

 **thebetteryuri:** i’ll do it

 **pika+chu:** shit i was kidding

 **pika+chu:** mostly

 **pika+chu:** but youre actually willing to do it

 **vitya:** i understand yurio

 **vitya:** but what have i ever done to you phichit :(

 **pika+chu:** your ‘love is in the air♫’ bull

 **thebetteryuri:** HE DID THAT TO YOU TOO??

 **pika+chu:** the conspiracy unravels

 **vitya:** i am not sorry

 **thebetteryuri:** yuuri control your boyfriend

 **vitya:** kinky

 **katsudon-yuri:** im leaving you victor

 **vitya:** aw you know you love me

 **katsudon-yuri:** yeah i do  <33

 **vitya:** i love you too  <33

 **katsudon-yuri:** i love you more  <33333

 **vitya:** thats impossible i love you so much  <33333333333

 **katsudon-yuri:** anythings possible when it comes to our love  <33333333333333333333333333

 **katsudon-yuri:** wait do you hear that banging noise

 **thebetteryuri:**  i am repeatedly slamming my head against the wall

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i know there wasnt a lot of minami but NEXT CHAPTER THERE WILL BE A LOT OF HIM I GUARANTEE  
>  _alternative:_  
>  **miniminami:** hi (✪‿✪)ノ  
>  **katsudon-yuri:** aww minami youre so cute  
>  **miniminami:** *blows up from sheer excitement that his idol called him cute*  
>  rip minami  
> -  
> ALSO  
> I don't ship Minami and Phichit I just wanted Victor to say 'love is in the air~' again


	8. С днём рождения тебя Виктор

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yeah so on christmas day and boxing day (and probably 27th) I have to go to family christmas parties (boo)  
> so i won't be able to post? and there's only one chapter today because I'm writing a yuri on ice christmas one shot!! yeah idk if it'll be posted today bc i'll probably procrastinate  
> so yeah i'll update this on the 28th latest  
> sorry friends

**_‘no one leaves the sk8er bois’_ **

**katsudon-yuri:** its okay guys i stopped the bleeding

 **miniminami:** bleeding??? what happened

 **vitya:** yurio banged his head against the wall really hard

 **katsudon-yuri:** multiple times

 **thebetteryuri:** yeah you should consider other peoples feelings before frlithging

 **pika+chu:** frlithging

 **liondelaiglesia:** frlithging

 **thebetteryuri:** stfu im injured

 

_private message from **theotabest** to **thebetteryuri**_

**theotabest:** are you okay

 **thebetteryuri:** yeah, it just hurts a little

 **theotabest:** hope you feel better

 **thebetteryuri:** thanks :)

 **theotabest:** sure :)

 

**_‘no one leaves the sk8er bois’_ **

**liondelaiglesia:** so

 **liondelaiglesia:** is everyone excited

 **katsudon-yuri:** for what

 **liondelaiglesia:** FOR CHRISTMAS

 **katsudon-yuri:** i don’t celebrate Christmas

 **chris(tmas):** !!!!

 **thebetteryuri:** we dont really either

 **liondelaiglesia:** DOES NO ONE CELEBRATE CHRISTMAS

 **chris(tmas):** I do! If you couldn’t tell haha.

 **theotabest:** i dont

 **guay-hong:** me neither

 **pika+chu:** nope

 **miniminami:** sorry, i dont

 **liondelaiglesia:** it's just you and me chris :,(

 **vitya:** but do you know what else can be celebrated on December 25 th

 **katsudon-yuri:** yes, we know

 **thebetteryuri:** as if you havent been jumping around for the past week yelling about it

 **liondelaiglesia:** much confuse

 **vitya:** it

 **vitya:** is

 **vitya:** my

 **vitya:** b i r t h d a y

 **guay-hong:** oh okay

 **katsudon-yuri:** so abrupt lol

 **chris(tmas):** You know you’re almost thirty now, Victor.

 **vitya:** …

 **vitya:** no need to remind me

 **katsudon-yuri:** wow everything is quiet here

 **katsudon-yuri:** victors not shouting

 **thebetteryuri:** must mean something’s wrong

 

_private message from **vitya** to **katsudon-yuri**_

**vitya:** you don’t think im old do you

 **katsudon-yuri:** of course not victor

 **katsudon-yuri:** youre only four years older than me

 **vitya:** four… years…

 **katsudon-yuri:** oh god

 **katsudon-yuri** : wait

 **katsudon-yuri:** youre in your room right

 **vitya:** yes…

 **katsudon-yuri:** im coming one sec

 **vitya:** am i not too old for you????

 **katsudon-yuri:** gdi vitya wait for me

 **vitya:** omg

 **vitya:** you called me vitya

 **katsudon-yuri:** oh

 

**_‘no one leaves the sk8er bois’_ **

**vitya:**  i feel better now

 **thebetteryuri:**  just better? you just started jumping on your bed i can hear it from here

 **katsudon-yuri:** wait is this because

 **vitya:** yess!!!!!

 **katsudon-yuri:** oh haha

 **guay-hong:** whats going on

 **vitya:** nothing aha

 **miniminami:** now im curious o_O

 **vitya:** its for us to know and you to never find out ;)

 **pika+chu:** is this dirty or sthg

 **katsudon-yuri:** no of course not

 **pika+chu:** what do you mean ‘of course not’

 **pika+chu:** youre like the dirtiest person i know

 **katsudon-yuri:** umm what do you mean

 **pika+chu:** one time…

 **liondelaiglesia:** there are children in this chat phichit

 **pika+chu:** lmao sorry yurio

 **thebetteryuri:** im not a child

 **guay-hong:** but you are?

 **thebetteryuri:** youre only two years older than me stfu

 **vitya:** what do you mean phichit about yuuri being dirty

 **katsudon-yuri:** but im not dirty?????

 **pika+chu:** this one time

 **pika+chu:** he said that he wanted victor to

 **vitya:** to…?

 **pika+chu:** kiss him

 **pika+chu:** _on the cheek_

 **vitya:** …

 **pika+chu:** scandalous ikr

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> obligatory christmas mention (even more obligatory vitya's birthday mention)  
> little known fact: i am actually scrooge im not one for christmas that's why there was more victuuri and otayurio than actual christmas  
> ALSO: I WAS READING YOUR COMMENTS AT TWO AM TODAY AND CRYING WITH HAPPINESS YOU PEOPLE ARE AMAZING I LOVE YOU ALL


	9. arrival of jj overshadowed by otayuri

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> SORRY FOR NOT UPDATING BUT IF YOU'VE READ MY LAST NOTE I SAID THAT I DIDN'T HAVE ACCESS TO COMPUTER TIL TODAY :(  
> also, jj arrives

**_‘no one leaves the sk8er bois’_ **

**chris(tmas):** JJ asked me to add him to the chat… Should I?

 **katsudon-yuri:** please no

 **chris(tmas):** Okay.

 **vitya:** now hes asking me

 **katsudon-yuri:** whyyyy

 **vitya:** dw i said no

 **katsudon-yuri:** thanks babe  <333

 **vitya:** no problem love  <333

 **thebetteryuri:** gag

 **pika+chu:** why cant we add jj?

 **thebetteryuri:** bc he called me a girl

 **katsudon-yuri:** amongst other things

 **miniminami:** ooh ive never talked to him~

 **pika+chu:** then now’s ur chance!!

**_chris(tmas)_ ** _added **KingJJ**_

**KingJJ:** hello everyone

 **pika+chu:** hi JJ

 **KingJJ:** hi phichit

 **thebetteryuri:** can i leave

 **pika+chu:** no one leaves the chat

 **KingJJ:** i heard this chat is for discussing skating techniques

 **KingJJ:** you should all tell me what your weaknesses are

 **KingJJ:** purely so i can help you improve :)

 **vitya:** smooth

 **KingJJ:** i have no idea what youre talking about victor

 **KingJJ:** also who is miniminami

 **miniminami:** hi im minami kenjiroヾ(＾∇＾)

 **KingJJ:** hello

 **KingJJ:** are all japanese people this cute???

 **katsudon-yuri:** not really

 **katsudon-yuri:** just minami

 **miniminami:** omg im blushing (*≧∀≦*)

 **vitya:** aww yuuri youre cute too~

 **vitya:** cutest person i know

 **liondelaiglesia:** rude

 **liondelaiglesia:** i’ll have you know

 **liondelaiglesia:** the cutest person

 **liondelaiglesia:** is

 **liondelaiglesia:** guang-hong ji

 **guay-hong:** omg

 **guay-hong:** omg

 **guay-hong:** omg

 **chris(tmas):** I’m sure that I’m the cutest person.

 **KingJJ:** king jj is the cutest

 **liondelaiglesia:** guang is having a breakdown because i called him cute

 **guay-hong:** omg

 **liondelaiglesia:** and i’ll say it again ;)

 **thebetteryuri:** what is everyone doing ¬_¬

 **pika+chu:** youre all wrong

 **pika+chu:** im the cutest

 **katsudon-yuri:** okay that’s fair

 **miniminami:** i second that ^

 **chris(tmas):** Phichit is pretty cute~

 **thebetteryuri:** please stop

 

_private message from **theotabest** to **thebetteryuri**_

**theotabest:** for the record i think youre pretty cute yourself

 **thebetteryuri:** i…

 **thebetteryuri:** thanks

 **theotabest:** no problem

 

**_‘no one leaves the sk8er bois’_ **

**vitya:** yuuri, yurio, did you hear a squeal?

 **katsudon-yuri:** yes, im worried

 **pika+chu:** omg is everything okay

 **thebetteryuri:** i don’t know what you guys are talking about i heard nothing

 **vitya:** …

 **KingJJ:** smells fishy

 **katsudon-yuri:** i found the source

 **pika+chu:** what was it

 **thebetteryuri:** NOTHING

 **katsudon-yuri:** yes it was nothing ahahahaahahahaHELPahaha

 **katsudon-yuri:** im rungind ahwya

 **katsudon-yuri:** victor please help yurio’s threatening me with his skates

 **katsudon-yuri:** i climbed on top of the cupboard so he cant reach me

 **katsudon-yuri:** but im sure he’ll find a way

 **vitya:** yurio stop trying to kill your father

 **thebetteryuri:** after i kill katsudon youre next victor

 **miniminami:** this is scary…

 **miniminami:** good luck yuuri-san!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *insert funny joke about knife shoes*  
> who is the cutest???? also what should i change chris' name to now that christmas is over


	10. chapter 10, or everyone gets distracted from yurio's squeal

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> fuck, i dont know what this is, i wrote this at 3am in the morning for some reason and edited it a little this morning  
> (I inserted a huge spiel about pink panther??? what is up with my brain)  
> ALSO thanks for all the chris name change things I have found a suitable name AND NEXT CHAPTER I WILL USE IT

**_‘no one leaves the sk8er bois’_ **

**vitya:** yurio’s skates have been hidden

 **vitya:** he cant threaten us any longer

 **katsudon-yuri:** theyre not actually hidden they were just put on a high shelf

 **KingJJ:** aw shorty

 **miniminami:** there’s nothing wrong with being short ( ≧Д≦)

 **chris(tmas):** Aww, cute.

 **thebetteryuri:** i dont need my skates to kill you ive got my fists

 **liondelaiglesia:** aw honey your fists cant even break glass

 **thebetteryuri:** FUCKING BITE ME

 **chris(tmas):** Gladly. ;)

 **vitya:** woah stop right there giacometti

 **katsudon-yuri:** no flirting with my son

 **liondelaiglesia:** anyway

 **liondelaiglesia:** we’ve established that yurio was the one who screamed

 **thebetteryuri:** I WAS NOT

 **guay-hong:** but why?

 **pika+chu:** [*film noir music plays in background*](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LvvAqbCrG5U)

 **chris(tmas):** More like [this kind of music](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YpAbKiMK6dw)

 **katsudon-yuri:** t…ten hours

 **chris(tmas):** It’s good though.

 **KingJJ:** you’ve watched it all? i commend you on that great feat

 **vitya:** remember what we were talking about

 **vitya:** yurio’s squeal

 **thebetteryuri:** gdi

 **thebetteryuri:** i didn’t squeal

 **katsudon-yuri:** your knife shoes in my face beg to differ

 **liondelaiglesia:** knife shoes

 **guay-hong:** knife shoes

 **KingJJ:** knife shoes

 **miniminami:** knife shoes?

 **pika+chu:** yuuri just memed

 **katsudon-yuri:** okay but yurio screaming

 **katsudon-yuri:** lets get back to that

 **thebetteryuri:** lets not

 **thebetteryuri:** because i didn’t scream

 **guay-hong:** maybe he saw a spider

 **katsudon-yuri:** no it was more of a “oh-my-god-senpai-noticed-me squeal”

 **vitya:** whos your senpai yurio ;))))

**_thebetteryuri_ ** _left the group_

**pika+chu:** n o   o n e   l e a v e s   t h e   c h a t

**_pika+chu_ ** _added **thebetteryuri** to the group_

**liondelaiglesia:** your silence speaks yurio

 **thebetteryuri:** shut up

 **thebetteryuri:** maybe it was next door

 **katsudon-yuri:** then why did you threaten to kill me if i told anyone what happened

 **thebetteryuri:** i don’t remember saying that

 **thebetteryuri:** nope

 **thebetteryuri:** never said that

 **miniminami:** aw don’t all gang up on yuri!

 **thebetteryuri:** thanks

 **miniminami:** no problem! ٩( 'ω' )و

 

_private message from **theotabest** to **thebetteryuri**_

**theotabest:** are you really okay

 **thebetteryuri:** yeah im fine haha

 **theotabest:** good

 **thebetteryuri:** sorry for worrying you

 **theotabest:** that's okay

 

_private message from **vitya** to **thebetteryuri**_

**vitya:** yurio

 **thebetteryuri:** …what

 **vitya:** you can tell me what happened

 **thebetteryuri:** nothing happened

 **vitya:** was it otabek

 **thebetteryuri:** ummmmm no

 **thebetteryuri:** WHY WOULD IT BE OTABEK

 **vitya:** mhm okay

 **thebetteryuri:** WHAT IS THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN

 **vitya:** please yuri you deserve to be happy

 **thebetteryuri:** you better watch out

 

**_‘no one leaves the sk8er bois’_ **

**vitya:** if i die now bury me with my maccachin tissue box

 **thebetteryuri:** when*** you die

 

_private message from **vitya** to **theotabest**_

**vitya:** when i die you must take care of yurio

 **theotabest:** what

 **vitya:** yuri’s going to kill me so he will lose a parent

 **vitya:** you must fill that gaping hole in his heart

 **theotabest:** um

 **theotabest:** okay?

 **vitya:** thank you otabek i can rest in peace

 

_private message from **theotabest** to **thebetteryuri**_

**theotabest:** please don’t kill victor

 **theotabest:** he’s being strange

 **thebetteryuri:** …what did he say

 **theotabest:** that I have to “fill a gaping hole in your heart”

 **thebetteryuri:** grjfd;lksa;Fldsgajk h

 **thebetteryuri:** WHAT THE FUCG

 **theotabest:** don’t get arrested for murder please we wouldn’t be able to talk again

 **thebetteryuri:** oh

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> tfw you're actually shorter than minami :,(  
> I don't know how to write crushes and love and shit like that im sorry


	11. losers + yuri plisetsky

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't even know what's happening any more I'm just bullshitting this like an english paper oops  
> thanks to [fandom_frenzy](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Fandom_frenzy) for suggesting name change of chris

**_‘no one leaves the sk8er bois’_ **

**KingJJ:** this group is very active

 **pika+chu:** you cant leave

 **pika+chu:** read the group name

 **pika+chu:** no one leaves the sk8er bois

 **pika+chu:** no one

 **katsudon-yuri:** why are you so adamant on that phichit

 **liondelaiglesia:** yeah are you building a cult or something

 **pika+chu:** …

 **guay-hong:** omg you are

 **pika+chu:** haha im just kidding

 **pika+chu:** kind of

 **liondelaiglesia:** i remember you did say you wanted to make a show with you ice skating

 **guay-hong:** yeah and have all of us participating

 **pika+chu:** ahahahaaaa when did i say that

 **katsudon-yuri:** oh yeah! you drew this for me

 **katsudon-yuri:** [whats_up_with_phichits_imagination.jpg](https://68.media.tumblr.com/81e82179da7aa8733437af8efd588710/tumblr_oin2zqX4io1v9ar1no1_540.png)

 **pika+chu:** ive been outed

**_pika+chu_ ** _renamed the group **‘phichit on ice ft. everyone else’**_

**katsudon-yuri:** ¬_¬

 **chris(tmas):** Are we actually invited to participate in your show?

 **pika+chu:** yep :)))))

 **vitya:** chris… you actually want to join?????????

 **chris(tmas):** Why not? It could be fun.

 **pika+chu:** SOMEONE APPRECIATES ME

 **miniminami:** i think it would be fun too (〜^∇^)〜

**_thebetteryuri_ ** _renamed the group **‘losers’**_

**thebetteryuri:** youre all losers

 **guay-hong:** you just called yourself a loser you know

 **thebetteryuri:** shit

**_thebetteryuri_ ** _renamed the group **‘lovers + yuri plisetsky’**_

**KingJJ:** LOVERS??

 **thebetteryuri:** FUCK

 **katsudon-yuri:** omg

**_thebetteryuri_ ** _renamed the group **‘losers + yuri plisetsky’**_

**vitya:** youre also calling your boyfriend a loser

 **thebetteryuri:** i dont have a boyfriend

 **katsudon-yuri:** it’s okay son we know ;))

 **thebetteryuri:** not your son

 **thebetteryuri:** don’t have a boyfriend

**_liondelaiglesia_ ** _renamed the group **‘we’re all losers except minami and otabek’**_

**miniminami:** uh thanks i guess haha (；・∀・)

 **theotabest:** thank you

 **katsudon-yuri:** but victor isn’t a loser either :-;

 **vitya:** and yuuri isn’t one  <3

 **guay-hong:** how about this

**_guay-hong_ ** _renamed the group **‘sk8er bois’**_

**liondelaiglesia:** aw peace maker guang i love it

 **guay-hong:** haha

 **liondelaiglesia:** aw don’t blush guang

 **pika+chu:** wait leo youre still with guang?? it’s like youre married

 **liondelaiglesia:** nah i can just tell hes blushing

 **miniminami:** couple goals

**_thebetteryuri_ ** _renamed the group **‘sk8er bois + dog’**_

**KingJJ:** who’s the dog

 **thebetteryuri:** chris

 **chris(tmas):** Why do you hate me :(

 **vitya:** that’s a valid question

 **thebetteryuri:** chris hits on me whenever i see him

 **thebetteryuri:** despite being 10 years my senior

 **katsudon-yuri:** but he hits on everyone

 **thebetteryuri:** I am 15

 **thebetteryuri:** he is 25

 **thebetteryuri:** _he slapped my arse once_

 **chris(tmas):** But you’re too cute!

 **liondelaiglesia:** chris thats weird

 **guay-hong:** yuri’s still a minor

 **chris(tmas):** I’m sorry, I’ll never do it again, I promise.

 **thebetteryuri:** whatever

**_thebetteryuri_ ** _renamed the group **‘sk8er bois’**_

**vitya:** omg chris coming from him that was amazing

 **KingJJ:** it must be the Christmas spirit

 **liondelaiglesia:** its way past christmas dude

 **vitya:** that reminds me chris you need to change your name now

**_chris(tmas)_ ** _changed to **chris(py)**_

**miniminami:** crispy?

 **chris(py):** chris(py)

 **pika+chu:** [chrispy.jpg](https://68.media.tumblr.com/0368ea25751943200f0de99043b4dd74/tumblr_oiwpy79LBn1v9ar1no1_540.jpg)

 **katsudon-yuri:** british crisps with swiss ice skater

 **pika+chu:** i know i had to cover up the union jack on one of the crisps with chris’ face

 **liondelaiglesia:** union chris

 **katsudon-yuri:** [union_chris.jpg](https://68.media.tumblr.com/e72bde406e74d6679cc1e342f69eef83/tumblr_oiwq6hHdzb1v9ar1no1_540.jpg)

 **thebetteryuri:** why is everyone on this chat a loser

 **thebetteryuri:** almost everyone

 **vitya:** almost everyone excluding you and your bf ;)))

 **thebetteryuri:** I DON’T HAVE A BOYFRIEND

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yeah i felt like i had to explain why yurio hated chris  
> ALSO I KNOW CRISPS DON'T MEAN CRISPS IN CERTAIN PARTS OF THE WORLD AND WALKERS ARE A BRITISH BRAND AND NONE OF THEM ARE BRITISH BUT I FOUND IT FUNNY  
> (and I made those beautiful chris pics you're welcome)


	12. w(h)att is the unit of power

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry I don't know what I'm doing please don't kill me  
> I know it's terrible  
> BUT MORE OTAYURI AMIRITE

**_‘sk8er bois’_ **

**KingJJ:** have you ever been so drunk off your arse that you manage to comb your hair with a phone charger?

 **KingJJ:** because apparently i did that last night

 **katsudon-yuri:** i… i have no words

 **chris(py):** But what happened to the phone charger?

 **vitya:** and can a balloon stick to your hair?

 **KingJJ:** ?

 **vitya:** because it’s… _charged_ ;))

 **vitya:** hehe physics puns

 **katsudon-yuri:** im breaking up with you vitya

 **vitya:** but don’t you sense the _attraction_ between us

 **thebetteryuri:** g od

 **vitya:** don’t be so _negative_ yurio

 **katsudon-yuri:** …………

 **vitya:** you can’t deny that there are _sparks_ flying

**_katsudon-yuri_ ** _removed **vitya**_

**pika+chu:** okay im not even going to complain

 **liondelaiglesia:** naw theyre really cool

 **liondelaiglesia:** punny sk8er dad

**_liondelaiglesia_ ** _added **vitya**_

**vitya:** that was rude yuuri… you really have the _power_ in this relationship

 **chris(py):** Why all the physics jokes?

 **vitya:** the pun _force_ is too strong

**_KingJJ_ ** _renamed the group **‘no physics in this chat whatsoever’**_

**vitya:** my puns have been _reflected_

 **guay-hong:** that was a stretch

 **vitya:** :’(

 **vitya:** _watt_ do you mean I thought it was fine

 **thebetteryuri:** if anyone makes a pun in this chat ever again I will kill them

 **thebetteryuri:** personally

 **theotabest:** that _hertz_

 **katsudon-yuri:** oh my god

 **theotabest:** did you mean Ω y god

 **liondelaiglesia:** ohm y god ahahahhgahaha

 **KingJJ:** IT’S ALWAYS THE QUIET ONES

 **theotabest:** why is everyone so _shocked_

 **thebetteryuri:** guess who’s going to get murdered

 **theotabest:** who?

 **vitya:** otabek can you not see the _gravity_ of this situation

 **theotabest:** hmm, i have been called pretty _dense_ before

 

_private message from **katsudon-yuri** to **thebetteryuri**_

**katsudon-yuri:** do you regret your crush on otabek now

 **thebetteryuri:** definitely

 **thebetteryuri:** WAIT

 **thebetteryuri:** I DON’T HAVE A CRUSH

 **katsudon-yuri:** omg you actually said it

`_katsudon-yuri took a screenshot!_`

**thebetteryuri:** hgsdlkjfad;l

 **thebetteryuri:** i will kill you if you tell anyone

 **katsudon-yuri:** don’t worry

 **katsudon-yuri:** but

 **katsudon-yuri:** you need to tell otabek

 **thebetteryuri:** tell him what

 **katsudon-yuri:** you know

 **katsudon-yuri:** about your huge

 **katsudon-yuri:** raging

 **katsudon-yuri:** crush

 **thebetteryuri:** it’s not huge

 **katsudon-yuri:** even so

 **katsudon-yuri:** it’s still a crush ;)

 

**_‘no physics in this chat whatsoever’_ **

**guay-hong:** say what you will but those puns were awesome

 **liondelaiglesia:** victor and otabek TEACH ME

 **liondelaiglesia:** how to be COOL

 **guay-hong:** i can teach you that

 **guay-hong:** “guay-hong” is my name

 **liondelaiglesia:** ‘guay-hong’ ur not cool

 **liondelaiglesia:**  in the doctor and rose tyler beach scene you started crying

 **guay-hong:** IT WAS EMOTIONAL

 **guay-hong:** anyway i am very cool

**_guay-hong_ ** _changed to **cool-hong**_

**pika+chu:** omg

 **pika+chu:** i read that as ‘cool-dong’ by accident

**_cool-hong_ ** _changed to **cool-dong**_

**pika+chu:** oh god

 **liondelaiglesia:** why am i dating you guang

 **miniminami:** to be honest

 **miniminami:** those puns were -273°C

 **chris(py):** What?

 **miniminami:** they were 0k

 **miniminami:** [takes_a_bow.jpg](https://68.media.tumblr.com/c760f7de2efc799c21b23122e97c83f6/tumblr_oiy518obAm1v9ar1no1_250.jpg)

 **KingJJ:** i was not expecting that

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yeah, I came up with all those puns (except for the 'watt' one I got that from my physics teacher)  
> disclaimer: I have never been so drunk off my arse that I managed to comb my hair with a phone charger


	13. HPTTY NES YER

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I should have posted this before when it was actually New Year’s Day in japan but it’s new year’s for me so~ HAPPY NEW YEAR FOLKS HOPEFULLY 2017 WON'T BE AS SHITTY AS 2016 WAS

**_‘no physics in this chat whatsoever’_ **

**pika+chu:** this chat has descended into chaos

**katsudon-yuri:** you…

**katsudon-yuri:** you just realised that now

**liondelaiglesia:** we’re all mad here

**liondelaiglesia:** im mad. youre mad

**cool-dong:** how do you know im mad

**liondelaiglesia:** you must be or else you wouldnt have come here

**cool-dong:** and how do you know that youre mad

**liondelaiglesia:** fuck i don’t know the rest

**cool-dong:** aw

**KingJJ:** what

**katsudon-yuri:** they were quoting alice in wonderland I think

**liondelaiglesia:** sin punctuation

**vitya:** that was beautiful

**cool-dong:** ikr

**pika+chu:** slightly dampened by the fact that your name is ‘cool-dong’

**cool-dong:** shit ur right

**_cool-dong_ ** _changed to **guay-hong**_

**liondelaiglesia:** aw dam

**thebetteryuri:** i regret knowing you all

**vitya:** aww we know you don’t mean that yurio~~~

**katsudon-yuri:** yeah, i doubt you regret knowing your boyfriend

**thebetteryuri:** I DON’T HAVE A BOYFRIEND YOU PIG

**pika+chu:** mhmm su~re

**thebetteryuri:** stop

 

_private message from **theotabest** to **thebetteryuri**_

**theotabest:** what does everyone mean about you having a boyfriend

**thebetteryuri:** nothing they’re just kidding

**theotabest:** are you sure?

**thebetteryuri:** 100%

**theotabest:** oh

 

_private message from **thebetteryuri** to **katsudon-yuri**_

**thebetteryuri:** why

**katsudon-yuri:** ?

**thebetteryuri:** why did you say that

**katsudon-yuri:** say what

**thebetteryuri:** aaaargh

 

**_‘no physics in this chat whatsoever’_ **

**vitya:** happy new year’s day!

**vitya:** 00:07am 1 st January 2017

**KingJJ:** its still 2016 for us lmao

**pika+chu:** still got two hours to go

**vitya:** dammit

**pika+chu:** so

**pika+chu:** victor

**vitya:** ?

**pika+chu:** did you

**pika+chu:** kiss

**pika+chu:** yuuri at midnight

**thebetteryuri:** they wouldnt freaking stop

**thebetteryuri:** barf

**vitya:** of course we did ;))

**vitya:** it was magical

**thebetteryuri:** gag

**chris(py):** Did you kiss anyone, Yuri?

**thebetteryuri:** no way

**vitya:** yeah, he’s saving himself for his boyfriend~

**thebetteryuri:** STOP SAYING I HAVE A BOYFRIEND

**miniminami:** happy new year everyone~

**KingJJ:** you too even though it’s not new year for us yet

**miniminami:** :)

**guay-hong:** is yuuri not online

**vitya:** he’s very drunk right now

**chris(py):** Drunk Yuuri is cute…

**vitya:** haha tell me about it

**thebetteryuri:** no he’s only had like three glasses of champagne

**thebetteryuri:** and hes lost all common sense

**katsudon-yuri:** heyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy

**liondelaiglesia:** hi yuuri

**katsudon-yuri:** heyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyeeeeyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy

**thebetteryuri:** someone take his phone away

**katsudon-yuri:** mEaNN  yurou

**katsudon-yuri:** yiurio

**thebetteryuri:** kill me

**pika+chu:** happy new year guys!

**katsudon-yuri:** HPTTY NES YER

**guay-hong:** it still isn’t 2017 yet in america

**theotabest:** happy new year

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yeah I don't know when I'll update because I have to revise for my mocks and idk if I'll have time to write more ;-;  
> but on the plus side all those physics puns helped me to revise~


	14. episode 10 ending flashbacks (+ more otayuri)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> pretend this is the morning after the last chapter

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i'm sorry for not updating yesterday (and for this crappy chapter) but on the plus side I FINISHED MY CHEMISTRY NOTES AND ONLY BIOLOGY AND ENGLISH NOTES LEFT TO GO!!  
> thanks for sticking with this haha

**_‘no physics in this chat whatsoever’_ **

**katsudon-yuri:** never have i regretted something so much

 **thebetteryuri:** what about in last year’s grand prix banquet

 **katsudon-yuri:** ive only ever regretted something so much once before

 **vitya:** aw no you were cute

 **chris(py):** Pole dancing with you was fun.

 **KingJJ:** oh god i remember that

 **liondelaiglesia:** woah yuuri you pole danced

 **katsudon-yuri:**........................................

 **katsudon-yuri:** ive got a hangover shut up

 **pika+chu:** so jealous i wanted to see drunk yuuri

 **vitya:** it was first time i talked to him properly

 **katsudon-yuri:** omg i dread to think

 **KingJJ:** [yuuri_and_victor_gpfbanquet.jpg](https://68.media.tumblr.com/9e9e3e0d101e666cd23c5560b4329bd6/tumblr_oj27grUkXo1v9ar1no1_540.png)

 **katsudon-yuri:** omg

 **katsudon-yuri:** did i actually do that

 **vitya:** yes ;)))

 **thebetteryuri:** [what_the_fuck.jpg](https://68.media.tumblr.com/9376cf24e64e6ffd5770aa453ae317ec/tumblr_oj27grUkXo1v9ar1no2_400.jpg)

 **chris(py):** Fun times.

 **vitya:** very

 **katsudon-yuri:** bye im going to go crawl in a hole and die

 **miniminami:** wow i never would have imagined yuuri-san doing that!

 **katsudon-yuri:** NEITHER WOULD I

 **pika+chu:** id like to thank the ice skating gods for this pure pic

 **liondelaiglesia:** same

 

_private message from **katsudon-yuri** to **vitya**_

**katsudon-yuri:** how do you not hate me after that omg

 **vitya:** it’s the opposite

 **vitya:** its when i fell in love with you~

 **katsudon-yuri:** i

 **katsudon-yuri:** um

 **katsudon-yuri:** woah

 **katsudon-yuri:** really?

 **vitya:** yep! even though you were drunk and pole-dancing with chris and practically grinded on me

 **katsudon-yuri:** oh god

 **katsudon-yuri:** that’s what you fell in love with??

 **vitya:** you were beautiful to me

 

**_‘no physics in this chat whatsoever’_ **

**KingJJ:** i think the best part was yuuri and yuri’s dance off

 **katsudon-yuri:** woah woah woah we did what

 **thebetteryuri:** oh god

 **pika+chu:** PICTURES

 **vitya:** [yurio_can_fly.jpg](https://68.media.tumblr.com/f155fa1ebe653d5f4c3ddec98c54b1b4/tumblr_oj7ql9Uri81v9ar1no1_540.jpg)

 **thebetteryuri:** oh my god

 **liondelaiglesia:** ahahaha were you drunk yuri

 **guay-hong:** which one

 **liondelaiglesia:** we all know yuuri was drunk lmao

 **katsudon-yuri:** please,,,

 **katsudon-yuri:** let me rest in peace,,,

 **vitya:** [dance_off_23.jpg](https://68.media.tumblr.com/4a34b4abd097748b49b7be5a4a37ff85/tumblr_oj7ql9Uri81v9ar1no2_1280.png)

 **thebetteryuri:** stop

 **chris(py):** That dancing was beautiful.

 **vitya:** ikr

 **pika+chu:** wow i never knew yuuri was such a good dancer

 **thebetteryuri:** he’s not im better

 **KingJJ:** as someone who was there i can attest to the fact that yuri p was a better dancer but obviously not as good as me

 **pika+chu:**  tone down your ego pls

 **vitya:** i think yuuri was a better dancer

 **katsudon-yuri:** aw thanks  <333

 **katsudon-yuri:** even though i don’t remember it

**_liondelaiglesia_ ** _renamed the group **‘yuuri vs yurio’**_

**katsudon-yuri:** what no

 **thebetteryuri:** im better anyway

 **thebetteryuri:** theres no competition

 **thebetteryuri:** i beat you in my first grand prix final as a senior

 **katsudon-yuri:** but this fic strays from canon so the grand prix final didn’t even exist in this universe

 **vitya:** its true me and yuuri arent engaged

 **miniminami:** woah victor and yuuri are engaged in canon????

 **guay-hong:** yes yuuri proposed to victor

 **pika+chu:** (dom yuuri)

 **katsudon-yuri:** wkhsgsjklfd;a

 **katsudon-yuri:** PHICHIT

 **KingJJ:** let’s stop breaking the fourth wall this isn’t even remotely funny

 **liondelaiglesia:** okay who do you think is better, yuuri or yurio

 **liondelaiglesia:** place your bets

 **theotabest:** yuri p

 **thebetteryuri:** thanks

 

_private message from **vitya** to **thebetteryuri**_

**vitya:** love is in the air♫

 **thebetteryuri:** YOU SHUT YOUR MOUTH RIGHT NOW

 **vitya:** don’t deny it~

 **vitya:** yuuri told me

 **thebetteryuri:** THAT FUCIFG PIG

 **thebetteryuri:** ILL KILL HIM

 **vitya:** omg i was just joking he didn’t tell me anything

 **thebetteryuri:** oh

 **thebetteryuri:** well shit

 **vitya:** will i have to give otabek the talk

 **thebetteryuri:** i will kill you

 **thebetteryuri:** if you even speak his name

 **vitya:** jealous?

 **thebetteryuri:** i am going to kill you

 

**_‘yuuri vs yurio’_ **

**katsudon-yuri:** haha we’re not competing with each other

 **thebetteryuri:** youre right ive already won

 **katsudon-yuri:** won what anyway

 **thebetteryuri:** life

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yeah so this seems really rushed because it is rushed  
> also if people dont speak at all it's because i've forgotten about them


	15. love is in the air♫

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yeah so im procrastinating and writing this fic yayy  
> SEUNG-GIL ARRIVES  
> his screen time was like one minute so I don't know how to write him but I hope I did a good job?

_private message from **katsudon-yuri** to **pika+chu**_

**katsudon-yuri:** why

 **katsudon-yuri:** why

 **katsudon-yuri:** why

 **pika+chu:** why what

 **katsudon-yuri:** w h y

 **katsudon-yuri:** why did you post that picture on Instagram

 **pika+chu:** you’ll have to be more specific

 **pika+chu:** i post a lot of photos

 **katsudon-yuri:** [i_will_kill_phichit.jpg](https://68.media.tumblr.com/081dd6f5814aabad32340bb48d977d7b/tumblr_oj97g6m5ss1v9ar1no1_540.jpg)

 **katsudon-yuri:**  THIS ONE

 **katsudon-yuri:** WHY

 **pika+chu:** it was cute~

 **katsudon-yuri:** but his fangirls

 **katsudon-yuri:** theyre out of control

 **pika+chu:** why

 **katsudon-yuri:** theyre saying “i stole him from them”

 **katsudon-yuri:** like, that is true

 **katsudon-yuri:** but he's not theirs in the first place!

 **katsudon-yuri:** and they don't even need to know

 **pika+chu:** hey at least i didnt post the one of you grinding on him

 **katsudon-yuri:** thanks phichit you really are a true friend

 **pika+chu:** you might want to tone down the sarcasm just a smidge

 

**_‘yuuri vs yurio’_ **

**katsudon-yuri:** i want to add seung gil lee to the group

 **vitya:** yes, lets do it

 **guay-hong:** but what about phichit

 **pika+chu:** what about me

 **liondelaiglesia:** um the fact that you have a crush on him?

 **pika+chu:** I DON’T

 **katsudon-yuri:** actually the fact that he has a crush is the one of the reasons im adding seung gil

 **katsudon-yuri:** also because we’re friends

 **pika+chu:** I DON’T HAVE A CRUSH ON HIM

 **pika+chu:** but is this because of the instagram post

 **katsudon-yuri:** yes

 **miniminami:** what post?

 **katsudon-yuri:** [i_will_kill_phichit.jpg](https://68.media.tumblr.com/081dd6f5814aabad32340bb48d977d7b/tumblr_oj97g6m5ss1v9ar1no1_540.jpg)

 **vitya:** awwww, cute~

 **pika+chu:** see, victor agrees

**_katsudon-yuri_ ** _added **seung gil lee**_

**katsudon-yuri:** welcome to this chat seung-gil

 **KingJJ:** hi, seung-gil

 **pika+chu:** he’s not responding

 **thebetteryuri:** why do you keep adding people

 **thebetteryuri:** also why do you keep talking

 **thebetteryuri:** im trying to sleep

 **guay-hong:** but its noon where you are

 **thebetteryuri:** your point being

 **seung gil lee:** hello

 **pika+chu:** hi seung-gil!

 

_private message from **pika+chu** to **vitya**_

**pika+chu:** i see you typing

 **pika+chu:** DO NOT SAY IT

 **vitya:** love is in the air♫

 **pika+chu:** please

 **pika+chu:** don’t do this to me

 **vitya:** but it’s true

 

**_‘yuuri vs yurio’_ **

**seung gil lee:** i assume this is a group chat for the men’s figure skating competitors

 **seung gil lee:** why is the name ‘yuuri vs yurio’

 **liondelaiglesia:** honestly i don’t even remember

 **KingJJ:** who was the better dancer in the gpf last year, yuuri or yuri

 **seung gil lee:** oh

 **vitya:** phichit im surprised you haven’t given the whole ‘no one leaves’ speech yet

 **katsudon-yuri:** he hasn’t because ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

 **pika+chu:** do you want to go katsuki

 **seung gil lee:** i don’t understand

 **chris(py):** Shall I explain?

 **pika+chu:** NO

 **thebetteryuri:** oh my god stop flirting

 **thebetteryuri:** i am trying to sleep

 **pika+chu:** no one is flirting!!!!!!!!! 1! !! 1!

 **thebetteryuri:** sure

 **guay-hong:** seung-gil it usually isn’t this chaotic in the chat

 **liondelaiglesia:** no, no it really is

 **seung gil lee:** so can i leave

 **katsudon-yuri:** phichit will probably say no

 **pika+chu:** yeah sorry seung-gil them’s the rules

 **KingJJ:** wait so seung-gil gets a ‘sorry’ but we don’t?????

 

_private message from **vitya** to **pika+chu**_

**vitya:** love is in the air♫

 **pika+chu:** no

 **pika+chu:** no love in the air

 **vitya:** mhmm sure

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> suggest names for seung-gil  
> also yes I did make that fake insta post because obviously i have too much time on my hands  
> I MIGHT NOT UPDATE FOR A FEW DAYS IM SORRY


	16. sk8er estranged aunt

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is very short and unedited but I didn't manage my time properly so wasn't able to write a proper chapter in time sorry :((  
> and I won't update for at least a week because I've got mock exams so......  
> I CAN'T BELIEVE I MISSED GUANG-HONG'S BIRTHDAY I EVEN PREPARED A BIRTHDAY THING FOR HIM :,(

**_‘yuuri vs yurio’_ **

**_pika+chu_ ** _changed the group to **‘sk8er bois’**_

**katsudon-yuri:** good, none of this yuuri vs yurio stuff

 **thebetteryuri:** yep because we all know im better

 **seung gil lee:** sk8er bois?

 **pika+chu:** yeah

 **pika+chu:** yuuri and victor are the sk8er dads, yurio and minami are the sk8er sons, leo guang-hong and otabek are the sk8er cousins, im the sk8er uncle, and chris is the sk8er god

 **chris(py):** Sk8er god? That’s much better than dog haha.

 **thebetteryuri:** he means dog

 **thebetteryuri:** ur the sk8er dog

 **KingJJ:** what am i

 **katsudon-yuri:** oh yeah we didn’t assign you a position

 **vitya:** sk8er grandpa

 **KingJJ:** im 19 years old!!!!

 **liondelaiglesia:** well you cant be a cousin there are already 3 of us

 **guay-hong:** sk8er estranged aunt

 **KingJJ:** WHY

 **vitya:** what about seung-gil

 **seung gil lee:** i dont need to have a ‘position’

 **pika+chu:** yes you do

 **liondelaiglesia:** sk8er uncle

 **pika+chu:** but im the sk8er uncle

 **vitya:** exactly

 **pika+chu:** WHAT

 **seung gil lee:** okay

 **pika+chu:** why do you all hate me

 **thebetteryuri:** so you can dish it out but you cant take it

 **pika+chu:** stooooop

 

_private message from **pika+chu** to **katsudon-yuri**_

**pika+chu:** make them stop

 **katsudon-yuri:** stop what

 **pika+chu:** you knowwwww

 **pika+chu:** about me and seung-gil

 **katsudon-yuri:** what about you :)

 **pika+chu:** stop teasingggggggggggggg

 **katsudon-yuri:** seriously?

 **katsudon-yuri:** do you know how many times you have teased me

 **pika+chu:** n0oo

 

**_‘sk8er bois’_ **

**_seung gil lee_ ** _left the group_

**pika+chu:** oh well look at that he left

 **thebetteryuri:** youre not going to bring him back???????

 **pika+chu:** haha i cant dictate

 **katsudon-yuri:** …

**_vitya_ ** _added **seung gil lee** to the group_

**vitya:** sorry seung-gil you cant leave

 **seung gil lee:** this chat is pointless

 **liondelaiglesia:** untrue

 **liondelaiglesia:** we talk about loads of important things

 **katsudon-yuri:** yeah like yuri p’s love life

 **thebetteryuri:** i

 **thebetteryuri:** stop

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry for not including the otayuri i promised loads of you but I have no time :(  
> I can't update for a week (at least) I'm so sorry  
> loads of people forget that JJ is 19 lol


	17. flight to khazakstan + victor katsuki-nikiforov

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> slightly longer than usual to apologise for the delay ;-; but on the plus side i've only got three exams left and by tuesday THEY'LL BE FINISHED so more frequent updates!!  
> pretend that yuuri, yurio and victor are living in russia okay (because of ep12 haha)

**_‘sk8er bois’_ **

**vitya:** wow… it seems like ages since we last talked

 **miniminami:** everyone was online just yesterday though

 **katsudon-yuri:** ^

 **pika+chu:** are you okay victor lol

 **seung gil lee:** can you all shut up please

 **pika+chu:** okay let’s all be quiet hahaha

 **seung gil lee:** …thanks

 

_private message from **vitya** to **pika+chu**_

**vitya:** love is in the air♫

 **pika+chu:** please

 

**_‘sk8er bois’_ **

**pika+chu:** yuuri stop your boyfriend

 **katsudon-yuri:** from doing what

 **thebetteryuri:** he’s probably doing something

 **thebetteryuri:** he always is

 **vitya:** i am… not offended

 **vitya:** that is absolutely true

 **liondelaiglesia:** hes becoming self-aware

 **pika+chu:** we need to stop victor from saying all of this ‘love is in the air’ bs it’s betting out of control whos with me

 **thebetteryuri:** i second that

 **guay-hong:**  lol when has he said it to you yuri

 **thebetteryuri:**...

 **thebetteryuri:** im choosing not to answer that

 **theotabest:** why

 **thebetteryuri:** gfucj

 **katsudon-yuri:** ohhhh

 **katsudon-yuri:** i understand

 **thebetteryuri:** stfu pig

 **liondelaiglesia:** now now yurio thats no way to treat your father

 **KingJJ:** yuuri is yuri’s father??

 **vitya:** yes

 **thebetteryuri:** why is everyone ganging up on me

 **miniminami:** probably because the author wants to see you suffer

 **chris(py):** The author…?

 **miniminami:** never mind lol

 

_private message from **theotabest** to **thebetteryuri**_

**theotabest:** what is everyone talking about

 **thebetteryuri:** lol what do you mean

 **theotabest:** about victor saying ‘love is in the air’

 **thebetteryuri:** oh

 **thebetteryuri:** um

 **thebetteryuri:** it’s a joke?

 **theotabest:** right

 **theotabest:** okay

 **thebetteryuri:** …yeah

 **theotabest:** when does your plane arrive

 **thebetteryuri:** im literally just boarding it now

 **thebetteryuri:** so about five hours

 **theotabest:** okay

 

**_‘sk8er bois’_ **

**pika+chu:** if victor and yuuri got married who would change their name

 **katsudon-yuri:** wait what

 **vitya:** me definitely

 **vitya:** victor katsuki

 **katsudon-yuri:** omg

 **pika+chu:** ohoho i see youve thought about it victor

 **liondelaiglesia:** but wouldnt you just hyphenate

 **liondelaiglesia:** like victor nikiforov-katsuki

 **vitya:** if we did it would be victor katsuki-nikiforov because yuuri is always first  <333

 **katsudon-yuri:** im

 **katsudon-yuri:** c.ryin?

 **katsudon-yuri:** what

 **guay-hong:** i think yuuri nikiforov sounds nice

 **miniminami:** hang on…

 **miniminami:** wouldn’t it be nikiforov yuuri because yuuri’s japanese

 **vitya:** oh yeah

 **KingJJ:** but would it then have to be victor katsuki-nikiforov or katsuki-nikiforov victor

 **vitya:** hmm, that is a tough one

 **katsudon-yuri:** what/?? Are you all ,,doing?

 **chris(py):** Why can’t yuuri and victor just keep their own names?

 **pika+chu:** because then it wouldnt be a proper marriage

 **chris(py):** It’s still a legal marriage…

 **vitya:** yeah but it doesnt sound as good

 **guay-hong:** yuuri what are your thoughts

 **katsudon-yuri:** what

 **katsudon-yuri:** what

 **katsudon-yuri:** what

 **vitya:** what?

 **KingJJ:** i think yuuris a little shocked~

 **katsudon-yuri:** since when was i getting married to vitya

 **liondelaiglesia:** since you called him ‘vitya’ omg so cute im practically squealing

 **guay-hong:** leo’s fanboy mode is turned on

 **liondelaiglesia:** shhh guang no one can know my secret

 **pika+chu:** yuuri what are you even talking about

 **pika+chu:** when we were roommates we had this exact same conversation

 **katsudon-yuri:** phichit stoooop

 **vitya:** but you didnt know me then

 **pika+chu:** yeh but katsuki yuuri has had a crush on you since the dawn of time

 **vitya:** aw babe you had a crush on me?

 **vitya:** that’s so embarrassing

 **katsudon-yuri:** we’re dating

 **vitya:** still~

 **pika+chu:** he also had posters of you on his wall…

 **pika+chu:** he got the same poodle as you…

 **pika+chu:** he named it victor after you...

 **vitya:** i thought the name was vicchan

 **katsudon-yuri:** nickname

 **vitya:** you should call me vicchan

 **katsudon-yuri:** what about vitya?

 **vitya:** you're right that is better

 **pika+chu:** he skated your routine…

 **katsudon-yuri:** stoop im blushing

 **katsudon-yuri:** fhsgadlkjad

 **liondelaiglesia:** what happened

 **katsudon-yuri:** victor just burst in and jumped on me

 **chris(py):** ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

 **vitya:** hhe

 **katsudon-yuri:** nothing like that!!!!!!! stop vitya

 **miniminami:** wheres yuri wouldn’t he be complaining by now

 **katsudon-yuri:** oh he’s on a plane he probably hasnt seen this yet

 **liondelaiglesia:** ooh where to

 **theotabest:** almaty

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yuri plisetsky on a plane to almaty?? what would he be doing there, hmmm...  
> seung gil didn't talk much but i feel he's one of those silent types like otabek  
> how would victor and yuuri have their surnames as?


	18. almaty

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> confession: i actually wrote this yesterday but my wifi was being shitty so i could only update today :((  
> ALSO MY EXAMS ARE OVER so more frequent updates? maybe?

**_‘sk8er bois’_ **

**guay-hong:** almaty?????

 **KingJJ:** as in khazakstan almaty?

 **theotabest:** what other almaty do you know

 **guay-hong:** omg

 **theotabest:** what

 **guay-hong:** …nothing

 **katsudon-yuri:** shouldnt he be there by now

 **theotabest:** still half an hour to go

 **liondelaiglesia:** is no one else freaking out

 **guay-hong:** i am

 **theotabest:** why would you be

 **liondelaiglesia:** because

 **liondelaiglesia:** um

 **theotabest:** ?

 **liondelaiglesia:** okay shut up im not speaking now

 **theotabest:** okay…

 **vitya:** i hope yurio gets there safely

 **katsudon-yuri:** same (⋟﹏⋞)

 **pika+chu:** sk8er dads

 **katsudon-yuri:** but like

 **katsudon-yuri:** what if he crashes

 **vitya:** omg no

 **chris(py):** …He’s been on a plane before.

 **katsudon-yuri:** yeah, but still

 **katsudon-yuri:** i cant help but worry

 **miniminami:** haha i wonder what yuri will say when he sees these messages

 **katsudon-yuri:** he’ll be in kazakhstan he wont be able to kill me

 **vitya:** aw yuuri i wouldnt let him kill you  <3

 **katsudon-yuri:** thanks vitya  <333

 **vitya:** <333 no problem babe

 **KingJJ:** youre so flirty haha

 **pika+chu:** like you arent like that with your girlfriend

 **KingJJ:** but only in private ;)

 **chris(py):** If Victor and Yuuri are doing this in public, I wonder what they are doing in private… ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

 **vitya:** ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

 **katsudon-yuri:** stop!!!!! we’re doing nothing of the sort

 **vitya:** lol just kidding

 **pika+chu:** you better be

 **pika+chu:** don’t corrupt my best friend

 **pika+chu:** he’s an innocent cinnamon roll

 **katsudon-yuri:** im four years older than you

 **pika+chu:** age is a social construct

 **guay-hong:** it isn't

 **katsudon-yuri:** i skated to eros??? how is that innocent

 **pika+chu:** yeah but you were skating for katsudon

 **guay-hong:** wait really

 **katsudon-yuri:** um

 **katsudon-yuri:** actually

 **katsudon-yuri:** i was kind of skating for vitya

 **vitya:** omg

 **vitya:** i mean, i knew

 **vitya:** but still

 **katsudon-yuri:** you knew!?!?!???!!!

 **chris(py):** I could also tell~

 **KingJJ:** tbh it didnt look like you were skating for food

 **katsudon-yuri:** omg

 **pika+chu:** if it’s any consolation yuuri

 **pika+chu:** i didnt know

 **katsudon-yuri:** gee thanks

 **vitya:** youre so cute yuuri

 **katsudon-yuri:** why don’t you say that to my face

 **katsudon-yuri:** iuagsshdlkjf

 **liondelaiglesia:** did he jump on you again

 **vitya:** yes ;)

 **thebetteryuri:** stop flirting victor and katsudon

 **thebetteryuri:** also why tf are you worrying about me pig

 **thebetteryuri:** and dont call be ‘yurio’ victor

 **thebetteryuri:** and leo can shut his mouth

 **vitya:** is that all

 **thebetteryuri:** there’s probably something else

 **katsudon-yuri:** nothing happened with the plane right?????

 **thebetteryuri:** duh im talking to you right now

 **katsudon-yuri:** and youre okay??????????????

 **thebetteryuri:** what do you think

 

_private message from **theotabest** to **thebetteryuri**_

**theotabest:** where are you

 **thebetteryuri:** at baggage reclaim

 **theotabest:** my motorbike is outside

 **thebetteryuri:** i’ll meet you there in a few minutes

 **theotabest:** okay

 

**_‘sk8er bois’_ **

**KingJJ:** so where are you staying yuri

 **thebetteryuri:** at otabek’s house

 **guay-hong:** …

 **thebetteryuri:** what

 **guay-hong:** nothing, nothing

 

_private message from **chris(py)** to **thebetteryuri**_

**chris(py):** Remember to use protection!

 **thebetteryuri:** what the fuck

 **thebetteryuri:** im

 **thebetteryuri:** .

 **thebetteryuri:** im 15

 **chris(py):** Still~

 **chris(py):** I don’t know what kids do these days.

 **thebetteryuri:** I DON’T EVEN THINK OF OTABEK LIKE THAT

 **chris(py):** Mmhm………

 

**_‘sk8er bois’_ **

**thebetteryuri:** just wanted to say that when i see chris again i’ll kill him

 **thebetteryuri:** just so youre all prepared

 **chris(py):** :(

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay but when I was writing this i was listening to ‘the theme of king jj’ on repeat BECAUSE I LOVE IT (AND HIM) so I was crying a bit so it may seem a little weird? haha


	19. i did not intend to participate in that meme

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hello friends ANOTHER UPDATE WOW i'm running out of ideas haha  
> ALSO::: I created a tumblr bookybookworm.tumblr.com and [PLEASE some of you give me ideas on what i can put in this chat](http://www.bookybookworm.tumblr.com/ask)  
> i made a long massive introduction post thats huge so if you want your eyes to bleed go read it

**_‘sk8er bois’_ **

**katsudon-yuri:** yurio where are you

 **thebetteryuri:** why

 **katsudon-yuri:** because im worried

 **katsudon-yuri:** have you been kidnapped

 **thebetteryuri:** no what are you on about

 **thebetteryuri:** im in otabeks house

 **vitya:** are you injured

 **thebetteryuri:** youll be injured if you keep asking me questions

 **vitya:** i am

 **vitya:** _offended_

 **vitya:** and  _hurt_

 **katsudon-yuri:** don’t worry vitya i’ll protect you

 **pika+chu:** tbh youre both stronger and taller than him

 **pika+chu:** who would win in a fight

 **pika+chu:** not yurio, thats for sure

 **thebetteryuri:** …

 **thebetteryuri:** i will personally fly to thailand to break your legs

 **pika+chu:** why

 **pika+chu:** is it because my legs are the only thing you can reach

 **katsudon-yuri:** woah

 **thebetteryuri:** I AM TWO CENTIMETRES SHORTER THAN YOU

 **liondelaiglesia:** lmao shorties

 **pika+chu:** you are two centimetres taller than me leo

 **guay-hong:** did you just inadvertently call me a shortie leo

 **liondelaiglesia:** ummmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm haha no i didnt

 **vitya:** haha i’m 180cm

 **miniminami:** omg youre so tall

 **miniminami:** hows the weather up there

 **katsudon-yuri:** why are we talking about height

 **pika+chu:** because yuri wanted to break my legs

 **thebetteryuri:** i’ll still do it

 **guay-hong:** yuri what are you going to do in khazakstan

 **liondelaiglesia:** yuri?

 **vitya:** yurio????

 **KingJJ:** he’s not replying

 **pika+chu:** is he embarrassed~~~

 **theotabest:** why would he be embarrassed

 **theotabest:** hes in the shower btw

 **chris(py):** ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

 **vitya:** chris no

 

_private message from **theotabest** to **thebetteryuri**_

`[12:24]`

**theotabest:** yura

 **theotabest:** when youre finished come to the kitchen

`[12:39]`

**thebetteryuri:** why

 **theotabest:** i made lunch

 **thebetteryuri:** you shouldnt have beka

 **theotabest:** its fine youre my guest

 **thebetteryuri:** okay five mins

 

**_‘sk8er bois’_ **

**liondelaiglesia:** did you know that a group of crows is called a murder

 **guay-hong:** why

 **liondelaiglesia:** because theyre evil

 **miniminami:** noo crows are cool i wanna be a crow

 **seung gil lee:** wrong sports anime

 **miniminami:** lmao sorry

 **katsudon-yuri:** what

 **katsudon-yuri:** also omg i forgot seung gil was here

 **liondelaiglesia:** where did he come from

 **pika+chu:** where did he go

 **liondelaiglesia:** WHERE DID HE COME FROM COTTON EYED JOE

 **guay-hong:** leo….

 **pika+chu:**  i did not intend to participate in that meme

 **pika+chu:** but no seriously where did he go

 **katsudon-yuri:** why are you asking

 **pika+chu:** becaaaauuuseeee….

 **pika+chu:** im asking for a friend

 **pika+chu:** his name is tom

 **vitya:** mhmmmmmmm ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

 **vitya:** omg!

 **pika+chu:** no dont you dare

 

_private message from **pika+chu** to **vitya**_

**pika+chu:** no

 **pika+chu:** don’t do it

 **vitya:** love is in the air♫

 **pika+chu:** why

 

**_‘sk8er bois’_ **

**pika+chu:** who even created this chat though

 **pika+chu:** it’s a mess

 **pika+chu:**  though it has caused two of my ships to become canon

 **katsudon-yuri:** okay 1. you created it

 **katsudon-yuri:** and two: which two ships

 **vitya:** 1 and two hahahaha

 **pika+chu:** well obviously it was victuuri

 **pika+chu:** and the other one: you know which ;;;;)))

 **miniminami:** who?

 **pika+chu:** cannot say

 **pika+chu:** do not want legs to be broken

 **thebetteryuri:** I SWEAR TO GOD

 **pika+chu:** my ships: canon

 **pika+chu:** yurio: angry

 **pika+chu:** legs: broken

 **pika+chu:** _i am forcibly removed from the group chat_

**_thebetteryuri_ ** _removed **pika+chu**_

 

_private message from **pika+chu** to **thebetteryuri**_

**pika+chu:** you actually did it hha

 **thebetteryuri:** blocked

 

**_‘sk8er bois’_ **

**thebetteryuri:** people i will murder when i next see them: phichit, chris, jj

 **KingJJ:** what have i done to offend you???

 **thebetteryuri:** exist

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i'm sorry there were like 138578 outdated memes in there i could not resist  
> also i, like yuuri, forgot that seung gil existed in this fic so i had to put him in  
> who got the haikyuu and mystic messenger references lol  
> VISIT MY [TUMBLR](http://www.bookybookworm.tumblr.com) PLS I WANT FRIENDS AND [IDEAS OF WHAT TO WRITE](http://www.bookybookworm.tumblr.com/ask)


	20. yiff!!! on ice

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay this'll be a long note sorry but: THANKS TO EVERYONE WHO FOLLOWED AND TALKED TO ME ON MY TUMBLR YOU GYS ARE AMAZING  
> i made so many friends i'm so happy and you're all the sweetest things to exist on this earth is2g  
> also gummigoo on tumblr gave me most of the plot line for this chapter SO THANKS !!!

`[1:00am Kazakhstan time]`

_private message from **thebetteryuri** to **theotabest**_

**thebetteryuri:** beka

 **thebetteryuri:** bekaaaaa

 **thebetteryuri:** otabek

 **theotabest:** what

 **thebetteryuri:** where are you

 **theotabest:** in my room?

 **thebetteryuri:** are you awake

 **theotabest:** obviously

 **theotabest:** why are you awake

 **thebetteryuri:** um

 **thebetteryuri:** no reason

 **theotabest:** yura…

 **thebetteryuri:** my cat scratched me

 **thebetteryuri:** its kind of bleeding

 **theotabest:** wait im coming to your room

 **thebetteryuri:** wait what

 

`[3:34am Kazakhstan time]`

**_‘sk8er bois’_ **

**vitya:** help i can’t find maccachin

 **katsudon-yuri:** he’s right here with me??

 **vitya:** where are you

 **katsudon-yuri:** in my room?

 **guay-hong:** you still have separate rooms haha

 **katsudon-yuri:** disglht

 **katsudon-yuri:** why wouldn’t we

 **liondelaiglesia:** ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

 **vitya:** ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

 **chris(py):** ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

 **katsudon-yuri:** stop

 **thebetteryuri:** stop flirting gdi

 **thebetteryuri:** im trying to lseep

 **guay-hong:** lseep

 **thebetteryuri:** i am too tired for this

 **liondelaiglesia:** then why don’t you sleep

 **thebetteryuri:** BECAUSE OF YOU FUCKWADS

 **thebetteryuri:** also my cat scratched me

 **KingJJ:** you took it to kazakhstan?

 **thebetteryuri:** yeah

 **vitya:** OMG ARE YOU OKAY YURIO

 **thebetteryuri:** …yes

 **thebetteryuri:** otabek helped

 **guay-hong:** wheres your cat now

 **thebetteryuri:** shes right next to me

 **liondelaiglesia:** In your bed? ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

 **thebetteryuri:** WHAT THE FCK IS THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN

 **chris(py):** Yuri, are you…

 **katsudon-yuri:** omg

 **chris(py):** …a furry?

 **thebetteryuri:** kjdsgah;fkA’S don’t yoU DARE

 **thebetteryuri:** say that

 **thebetteryuri:** again

 **chris(py):** You’re not denying it.

 **thebetteryuri:** I’m not!!!!!!! a furry

 **miniminami:** um.. what’s a furry

 **vitya:** who wants to say

 **thebetteryuri:** it doesn’t matter because im not a freaking furry

 **chris(py):** Okay, sure.

 **thebetteryuri:** i can literally hear the sarcasm go duck yourself

 **guay-hong:** duck

 **miniminami:** is no one going to explain what furry means?

 **KingJJ:** oh boy

 **guay-hong:** no way in hell will i explain that

 **liondelaiglesia:** same

 **katsudon-yuri:** same

 **vitya:** same

 **miniminami:** pleaaaaase?

 **miniminami:** i’m going to look on the urban dictionary

 **katsudon-yuri:** rip minamis innocence

 **miniminami:**  oh my god

 **miniminami:** why didn’t you tell me

 **miniminami:** i am

 **miniminami:** traumatised

 **miniminami:** yuri, why???

 **thebetteryuri:** I’M NOT A FUkcING FURRY

 **chris(py):** I beg to differ: [yuri_catears.jpg](https://68.media.tumblr.com/23170bd0de3d5dcd65f24a320f147e5f/tumblr_ok1a999gsn1v9ar1no1_540.png)

 **thebetteryuri:** I DIDNT PUT THEM ON

 **katsudon-yuri:** but you did keep them

 **KingJJ:** hmm… i also remember you wore a leopard print shirt once

 **vitya:** he also has…

 **thebetteryuri:** don’t u dare

 **vitya:** leopard print…

 **thebetteryuri:** stfu

 **guay-hong:** ooh im curious

 **_thebetteryuri_ ** _removed **vitya**_

 **katsudon-yuri:** wait

 **katsudon-yuri:**  does he mean

 **_thebetteryuri_ ** _removed **katsudon-yuri**_

 **pika+chu:** i was asleep but I WAKE UP TO THIS??

 **pika+chu:** no one leaves the chat

 **_pika+chu_ ** _added **katsudon-yuri**_

 ** _pika+chu_ ** _added **vitya**_

 **liondelaiglesia:** do you have a sixth sense or something

 **guay-hong:** i want to know what yuri has that is leopard print

 **thebetteryuri:** list of people am going to kill: phichit, chris, jj, guang-hong

 **guay-hong:** i am hurt

_private message from **theotabest** to **thebetteryuri**_

**theotabest:** wow i didn’t know you were a furry

 **thebetteryuri:** GODDAMN IT BAKE

 **theotabest:** “bake”

 **thebetteryuri:** I THOUGHT WE WERE FRIENDS

 **theotabest:** yeah we are

[**theotabest:** friends](http://archiveofourown.org/works/9420575)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay but last chapter no one noticed that yuri and otabek said "yura" and "beka" for the first time in this fic ahah  
> also what does otabek meeaaannnnn at the end and what did they do from 1am-3.30am hmmmmm


	21. ##whipped

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay so i'm not replying to anyone's comments anymore bc i've got school and not much time.. but just to clear up any confusion about the furries: chris meant it in a sexual way (bc yuri was "sleeping with" his cat) and that's what they're so grossed out about not the normal furry shit  
> also i kinda want to write a fic about that two and a half hour thing with otayuri.... shall i lmao  
> ALSO: about what otabek meant in the end.. no one really understood it except like two people lolol

_private message from_ **_vitya_ ** _to **thebetteryuri**_

**vitya:** yuriiioooo

 **vitya:** how is kazakhstan going

 **thebetteryuri:** what

 **vitya:** is it fun

 **thebetteryuri:** um yeah i guess? why are you asking

 **vitya:** merely fatherly concern

 **thebetteryuri:** YOURE NOT MY FATHER

 **vitya:** ~~luke~~ yurio, i am your father

 **thebetteryuri:** you know darth vader dies in star wars

 **vitya:** anyway

 **vitya:** have you

 **vitya:** confessed yet

 **thebetteryuri:** confessed what

 **vitya:** you know.

 **vitya:** your cruuuuush

 **thebetteryuri:** …

 **thebetteryuri:**  haha what crush,, on who

 **vitya:** [otayuri.jpg](https://68.media.tumblr.com/b303e59584882db57695c0ce8905e90d/tumblr_ok4n95mtBP1v9ar1no2_540.png)

 **vitya:** [otayuri1.jpg](https://68.media.tumblr.com/dec0b0efe6280b00e6de40e83b4191ec/tumblr_ok4n95mtBP1v9ar1no1_540.png)

 **thebetteryuri:** WHY

 **vitya:** seriously you should tell him

 **thebetteryuri:** what no i cant

 **vitya:** why not :(((

 **thebetteryuri:** obviously he doesnt feel the same way

 **vitya:** whaaaat

 **vitya:** how do you know that

 **thebetteryuri:** because . yesterday we were talking and he said we were friends

 **thebetteryuri:** like with a massive pause

 **vitya:** you _are_ friends anyway

 **vitya:** but that can change

 **vitya:** tell him or so help me god

 **vitya:** stop being an angsty teen

 **thebetteryuri:**  im not an angsty teen

 **vitya:** yes you are

 

**_‘sk8er bois’_ **

**pika+chu:** what day is it

 **pika+chu:** ive slept for so long

 **KingJJ:** …phichit

 **liondelaiglesia:** it’s 21 st january

 **liondelaiglesia:** 2018

 **pika+chu:** …

 **liondelaiglesia:** [youve_slept_for_a_year.jpg](https://68.media.tumblr.com/128859fe053b2e29e9159b9897a09963/tumblr_ok4nyxQMsv1v9ar1no1_540.jpg)

 **pika+chu:** shit youre right

 **pika+chu:** the evidence is right in front of me

 **miniminami:** wait it’s 2018???? omg what

 **guay-hong:** yes minami, did you sleep for a year too

 **miniminami:** i must have!

 **miniminami:** (゜ロ゜)

 **miniminami:** that means im eighteen now

 **thebetteryuri:** are you kidding me

 **thebetteryuri:** what

 **miniminami:** omg yuri did you sleep for a year also

 **thebetteryuri:** …they were pranking you

 **pika+chu:** aw yuri such a killjoy

 **liondelaiglesia:** partypooper

 **miniminami:** oh…

 **miniminami:** so i didnt sleep for a year! that’s good

 **KingJJ:** ……………………………

 **vitya:** ngl i almost believed it too

 **katsudon-yuri:** vitya you’ve been awake since yesterday morning dont lie

 **chris(py):** Ooh, you didn’t sleep last night?

 **chris(py):** What were you doing? ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

 **vitya:** wouldnt you like to know ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

 **chris(py):** ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

 **katsudon-yuri:** chris. vitya. no

 **guay-hong:** okay but seriously what were you doing

 **katsudon-yuri:**  having a mario kart tournament

 **liondelaiglesia:** who won

 **katsudon-yuri:** …victor did

 **vitya:** yuuri’s still bitter

 **katsudon-yuri:** YOU CHEATED!

 **vitya:** i think you mean

 **vitya:** w o n

 **katsudon-yuri:** that’s it i wont make any katsudon for you

 **vitya:** noooo wait you win i love you come back

 **pika+chu:** ##whipped

 **seung gil lee:** please

 **seung gil lee:** shut up all of you

 **katsudon-yuri:** aw let's all shut up

 **pika+chu:** yes let’s

 

_private message from **katsudon-yuri** to **pika+chu**_

**katsudon-yuri:** ##whipped

 **pika+chu:** you said to be quiet first!

 **katsudon-yuri:** yes, but im the sk8er dad

 **katsudon-yuri:** you? you are ##whipped

 

_private message from **theotabest** to **thebetteryuri**_

**theotabest:** you dont have any plans for lunch right

 **thebetteryuri:** youre the only one i know here haha

 **thebetteryuri:** so no

 **theotabest:** okay good. make sure youre ready by 1pm

 **thebetteryuri:** wait what

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> if you want go message me on my tumblr about anything and everything. like donald trump, yuri on ice, furries, anythin  
> AND TOMORROW THERE'LL BE MORE SEUNG GIL ACTION I HOPE


	22. ##exposed as a fanboy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay so yesterday I posted that fic for the 2.5 hours (otayuri mhmmmm) read it [here](https://archiveofourown.org/works/9420575). some of you have read it already and i'm sorry for the pain(not sorry)  
> also idk when i'll post next sorry :(((

_private message from **thebetteryuri** to **katsudon-yuri**_

**thebetteryuri:** KATSUDON

**katsudon-yuri:** hi yurio

**katsudon-yuri:** how are you

**thebetteryuri:** I NEED HELP

**katsudon-yuri:** omg

**katsudon-yuri:** youre asking me for help???

**katsudon-yuri:** hold on lemme just

**katsudon-yuri:** wipes_tear.jpg

**thebetteryuri:** I DONT NEED A PICTURE OF YOU CRYING YOU TURD

**thebetteryuri:** help

**katsudon-yuri:** okay whats wrong

**katsudon-yuri:** is it about otabek

**thebetteryuri:** …

**thebetteryuri:** yes

**katsudon-yuri:** i am all ears

**thebetteryuri:** shit

**thebetteryuri:** well

**thebetteryuri:** i think he just asked me on a date

**katsudon-yuri:** OH MY GOD YURI IM SO HAPPY FOR YOU

**thebetteryuri:** shut up

**thebetteryuri:** it’s just like

**thebetteryuri:** it might be a friend date

**katsudon-yuri:** THERES STILL A CHANCE

**thebetteryuri:** he said this: okay good. make sure youre ready by 1pm

**katsudon-yuri:** IT’S HALF PAST 12 THERE GET READY NOW

**thebetteryuri:** chill i got time

**thebetteryuri:** but

**thebetteryuri:** do you think it is

**thebetteryuri:** a date

**katsudon-yuri:** who knows? but you can get an idea if you actually go with him

**katsudon-yuri:** report back to me!!!

**thebetteryuri:** dammit ur invested in this now arent you

**katsudon-yuri:** of course i am

**katsudon-yuri:** and remember, if the date _goes well_

**katsudon-yuri:** use protection

**thebetteryuri:** AND HERE I THOUGHT YOU WERE BEING DECENT FOR ONCE

 

_**‘sk8er bois’** _

**guay-hong:** i cannot believe leo’s star sign is leo

**miniminami:** ooh im a leo too

**liondelaiglesia:** youre not a leo. youre a minami

**vitya:** are you quoting percy jackson

**liondelaiglesia:** so what if i am

**vitya:** bc minami was born on the same day as percy

**pika+chu:** *softly* holy shit

**pika+chu:** also chris was born on valentines day

**pika+chu:** some memes write themselves

**chris(py):** ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

**guay-hong:** is that all you do in this ~~story~~ group chat

**chris(py):** ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

**katsudon-yuri:** vitya was born on christmas

**vitya:** i am jesus

**katsudon-yuri:** youre not christian

**vitya:** jesus was jewish

**katsudon-yuri:** youre not jewish either

**KingJJ:** i was born on july 15

**guay-hong:** cancer

**pika+chu:** omg

**liondelaiglesia:** also otabek is a halloween baby

**liondelaiglesia:** spooky

**KingJJ:** what about yuuri

**katsudon-yuri:** 29 th november

**pika+chu:** im april 30

**liondelaiglesia:** you’re a taurus

**liondelaiglesia:** so you spout a load of

**liondelaiglesia:** bull

**pika+chu:** why am i friends with you

 

_private message from **sarararasputin** to **seung gil lee**_

**sarararasputin:** i still dont get how you find xiumin hotter than sehun

**seung gil lee:** excuse me have you even seen him

**sarararasputin:** YES AND SEHUN IS SO MUCH HOTTER

**seung gil lee:** sara.

**sarararasputin:** GILLY.

**seung gil lee:** you cannot deny that xiu is hot

**sarararasputin:** FINE HE IS HOT BUT NOT AS HOT AS

**sarararasputin:** [sehun_photo483.jpg](https://68.media.tumblr.com/8782004a23a1d257e43cc53421740505/tumblr_ok8ziwnj5Q1v9ar1no1_400.jpg)

 

_**‘sk8er bois’** _

**seung gil lee:** [my_bias.jpg](https://68.media.tumblr.com/17738b4728b20155a6aa74a4697e9b9a/tumblr_ok8ziwnj5Q1v9ar1no2_500.jpg)

**seung gil lee:** shit wrong chat

**pika+chu:** omg seung gil

**seung gil lee:** …what

**vitya:** ##exposed

**liondelaiglesia:** exposed for the true fanboy you are

**liondelaiglesia:**  doesn't seem so stoic now, huh

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thanks to gummigoo on tumblr for explaining the ins and outs of kpop and providing me with photos of shirtless korean men  
> i don't actually listen to kpop lolol  
> ALSO MORE OTAYURI OF COURSE


	23. mystery™

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> um. hi? i realise i haven't updated in FOREVER  
> but this kind of makes up for it?  
> not really, it's only 166 words. im sorry  
> hopefully i can update once a week at least with longer chapters, and my half-term break is in two weeks so..... hopefully i can update more then.

_private message from **vitya** to **thebetteryuri**_

**vitya:** so? how was your date

**thebetteryuri:** fuck off

**vitya:** it went bad? :(

**thebetteryuri:** stop texting me

**vitya:** yuri???

_private message from **vitya** to **katsudon-yuri**_

**vitya:** have you spoken to yurio yet

**katsudon-yuri:** no

**katsudon-yuri:** ooh i have to find out what happened on the date

**vitya:** he told me to ‘go away’

**vitya:** but with more expletives

**katsudon-yuri:** oh no do you think something is wrong

**katsudon-yuri:** i’ll text him

_private message from **katsudon-yuri** to **thebetteryuri**_

**katsudon-yuri:** yurio

**katsudon-yuri:** how did it go

**thebetteryuri:** STOP TEXTING ME

` _thebetteryuri blocked your number! they won’t be able to see your texts until they unblock you :)_ `

**katsudon-yuri:** yurio omg tell me what happened

**katsudon-yuri:** will i have to beat otabek up

 

_private message from **katsudon-yuri** to **theotabest**_

**katsudon-yuri:** otabek? are you with yuri right now

**katsudon-yuri:** hello

**katsudon-yuri:** ???

 

_private message from **katsudon-yuri** to **vitya**_

**katsudon-yuri:** yurio blocked me and otabek wont reply to me

**vitya:** what is going on

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> feel free to yell at/stab/straight up kill me


	24. sugar daddy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i'm very very ill so i had time to type this up lol  
> also i don't know where leo comes from so for the purposes of this fic, he comes from california  
> ALSO ABOUT THE LAST CHAPTER: I'M SORRY!! but most of you were wrong and some of you were half right haha

_private message from **katsudon-yuri** to **thebetteryuri**_

**katsudon-yuri** : yuri

 **katsudon-yuri:** it’s been five hours tell me what’s going on

 **katsudon-yuri:** unblock mee!!!!!!

_`thebetteryuri unblocked your number!`_

**thebetteryuri:** oh oops

 **thebetteryuri:** dont beat beka up

 **katsudon-yuri:** YURIO YOURE ALIVE

 **thebetteryuri:** don’t call me yurio

 **katsudon-yuri:** TELL ME WHAT HAPPENED

 **katsudon-yuri:** was it an actual proper date

 **thebetteryuri:** i think yes

 **katsudon-yuri:** guaheialoweiyt

 **katsudon-yuri:** yayyyyyyy

 **thebetteryuri:** stfu katsudon

 **thebetteryuri:** im going to sleep

 **katsudon-yuri:** WAIT I NEED MORE INFO

 

_private message from **theotabest** to **katsudon-yuri**_

**theotabest:** sorry i was out

 **katsudon-yuri:** oh that’s okay i talked to yuri

 **theotabest:** okay

 **katsudon-yuri:** ;)

 **theotabest:** what

 **katsudon-yuri:** nooothing ;;;)))))

 

**_‘sk8er bois’_ **

**KingJJ:** it’s almost valentines day~

 **KingJJ:** has everyone bought a present yet~~~

 **chris(py):** Aw, for my birthday? You shouldn’t have! ;)

 **guay-hong:** i think he means a valentines day present

 **vitya:** i’m getting yuuri one

 **katsudon-yuri:** wait what

 **vitya:** ;)))))

 **KingJJ:** i bought my fiancée many presents

 **KingJJ:** because she deserves them

 **liondelaiglesia:** i bought my present ages ago

 **guay-hong:** present for who

 **liondelaiglesia:** for you, you big pile of idiot

**_guay-hong_ ** _changed to **big pile of idiot**_

**big pile of idiot:** thanks daddy

 **big pile of idiot:** babe*** omg autocorrect

 **chris(py):**  Guang-Hong

 **chris(py):**  Do you...?

 **big pile of idiot:** oh god

 **miniminami:** what’s wrong

 **miniminami:** its just a typo??

 **liondelaiglesia:** guang-hong you big pile of idiot

 **pika+chu:** im screaming

 **miniminami:** seriously tell me

 **pika+chu:** guang hong has a daddy kink

 **pika+chu:** confirmed

**_liondelaiglesia_ ** _changed to **daddy**_

**daddy:** okay but guys

 **daddy:** do you know where daddy originated from

 **katsudon-yuri:** why

 **daddy:** it came from THE USA

 **daddy:** LIKE ME

 **daddy:** FROM C A L I F O R N I A

 **daddy:** LIKE ME

 **pika+chu:** are you saying that you are actually guang hong’s daddy

 **big pile of idiot:** GFKDJGSLA

 **big pile of idiot:** please phichit

 **daddy:** ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

 **big pile of idiot:** leo

 **chris(py):** Did you mean ‘daddy’?

 **miniminami:** what is a daddy kink

 **vitya:** ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

 **vitya:** ask guang

 **big pile of idiot:** ples stop

 **KingJJ:** leo how do you even know the origins of daddy

 **daddy:** heh

 **daddy:** _research purposes_

 **big pile of idiot:** …

 **big pile of idiot:** where is yurio

 **vitya:** subtle

 **vitya:** but yeah where is he

 **katsudon-yuri:** he said he was sleeping

 **katsudon-yuri:** YOU KNOW WHAT ELSE HE SAID

 **vitya:** OMG

 **katsudon-yuri:** YEAH IKR

 **pika+chu:** what are you talking about

 **vitya:** nothing you need to worry about child

 **pika+chu:** im 20

 **vitya:** child

 **daddy:** [the truth come out](http://www.reporterherald.com/ci_22623737/sugar-daddy-has-sweet-history)

 **pika+chu:** leoji are a kinky couple

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> if you're confused--  
> leo's new name: daddy  
> guang-hong's new name: big pile of idiot
> 
> THANKS TO gummigoo FOR THE DADDY THING it's hilarious and the idea is amazing im still laughing  
> that link that leo sent is the basis of this whole chapter


	25. hogwarts hogwarts hoggy warty hogwarts

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> um. hi? well shit i'm so sorry  
> but ya kno  
> school  
>  ~~apathy~~  
>  responsibilities  
> a level choices  
> -  
> THANKS FOR ALL THE WELL WISHES YOU GUYS ARE GREAT! I'm slightly better now, and it's the half-term holidays... so RELAXATION

**_katsudon-yuri_ ** _added **thebetteryuri**_

 **_katsudon-yuri_ ** _added **vitya**_

 **_katsudon-yuri_ ** _renamed the group **‘i neED ANSWERS’**_

 **katsudon-yuri:** yuri

 **katsudon-yuri:** you gotta tell me what happened

 **thebetteryuri:** what is this shit

 **vitya:** yes please yurio tell us

 **thebetteryuri:** tell what???

 **katsudon-yuri:** about youR DATE

 **thebetteryuri:** oh

 **thebetteryuri:** well. fuck

 **thebetteryuri:** umm

 **vitya:** aww yurio don’t be embarrassed

 **thebetteryuri:** im leaving

 **katsudon-yuri:** WAIT NO

 **katsudon-yuri:** vitya shh

 **katsudon-yuri:** please tell me

 **thebetteryuri:** so. we um. we basically went out for lunch?

 **thebetteryuri:** and then we were walking around

 **thebetteryuri:** and. he held my hand. for a bit

 **thebetteryuri:** he said bc it was cold but. he was blushing???

 **katsudon-yuri:** i am screaming

 **vitya:** its true

 **vitya:** same

 **thebetteryuri:** but like. we didnt say anything about it

 **katsudon-yuri:** WHY DONT YOU EXPRESS YOUR FEELING S

 **thebetteryuri:** shut up

 

**_‘sk8er bois’_ **

**pika+chu:** list of words containing ‘meow’

 **pika+chu:** go

 **big pile of idiot:** is this about that meme

 **big pile of idiot** : we’ve all been on tumblr you cant fool us

 **vitya:** wait what meme

 **vitya:** meowing

 **miniminami:** meowed?

 **vitya:** yeah! and meows

 **pika+chu:** homeowner

 **vitya:** wait what

 **vitya:** OMG YOURE RIGHT

 **miniminami:** wow!!!

 **vitya:** shook

 **katsudon-yuri:** … okay

 **pika+chu:** Hogwarts house

 **pika+chu:** go

 **katsudon-yuri:** …why

 **pika+chu:** i neeD TO KNOW KATSUKI

 **katsudon-yuri:** ravenclaw

 **vitya:** wait seriously

 **vitya:** i thought you’d be slytherin

 **thebetteryuri:** no ew i’m slytherin what

 **thebetteryuri:** he cant be slytherin too

 **pika+chu:** im definitely a puff

 **vitya:** i havent sorted myself yet im doing it now

 **daddy:** i’m obviously a proud lion and viCTOR WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU HAVENT DONE IT YET

 **big pile of idiot:** im ravenclaw

 **vitya:** chill i’m doing it

 **vitya:** one of the questions is “forest or river” IDK WHAT ONE I SHOULD CHOOSE

 **big pile of idiot** : follow your heart

 **vitya:** i chose river because if it freezes over i can skate on it

 **katsudon-yuri:** ice skating nerd

 **vitya:** we’re all professional skaters yuuri

 **KingJJ:** i’m hufflepuff too!!

 **thebetteryuri:** why is the narcissist a hufflepuff

 **KingJJ:** …

 **chris(py):** Oh, I’m a Ravenclaw just like Yuuri~

 **vitya:** [i_only_kiss_gold.jpg](https://68.media.tumblr.com/1e49e5682f2f9dc908922dd48a01b710/tumblr_ol9hnhIJzJ1v9ar1no1_540.png)

 **vitya:** another option was silver but alas i could not

 **katsudon-yuri:** VITYA WHY

 **vitya:** i am offended that they wouldnt let me take a dog into hogwarts

 **vitya:** i’ll take a natterjack toad

 **daddy:** if you kiss it will it become a prince

 **big pile of idiot:**  it’s a frog you uncultured swine

 **big pile of idiot:** toads just stay toads

 **daddy:** damn

 **vitya:** I GOT HUFFLEPUFF

 **KingJJ:** that was unexpected

 **miniminami:** ooh, i’m a slytherin!!

 **chris(py):** All the shorties are Slytherins...

 **thebetteryuri:** shtup

 **katsudon-yuri:** vitya you’re in hufflepuff… never would have guessed lol

 **daddy:** otabek, seung gil, what house are you in

 **theotabest:** gryffindor

 **daddy:** YAS ANOTHER GRYFF

 

**_‘i neED ANSWERS’_ **

**katsudon-yuri:** oooh the gryffindor and the slytherin hmmmmmmmmmm

 **vitya:** ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

 **thebetteryuri:** shut your fuck

 

**_‘sk8er bois’_ **

**seung gil lee:** i dont know and i dont care

 **pika+chu:** omg

 **_daddy_ ** _renamed the group **‘hogwarts + seung gil’**_

 **pika+chu:** shook

 

_private message from **katsudon-yuri** to **pika+chu**_

**katsudon-yuri:** rip

 **pika+chu:** SO HE FANBOYS ABOUT EXO BUT NOT ABOUT HARRY POTTER

 **katsudon-yuri:** rip phichit. cause of death: his crush didn’t share the same interests as him. what a dilemma. tune in next time to see if he keeps his crush.

 **pika+chu:** okay i can practically smell the sarcasm

 **pika+chu:** also how can i have a crush if im dead

 **katsudon-yuri:** the power of love

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> shut your fuck  
> i actually took the pottermore sorting hat thing for vitya because i _did not know_ what house he would be in... can you believe my luck when that gold thing appeared haha  
>  JJ is definitely hufflepuff fITE ME ON THIS  
> ALSO DOES ANYONE WATCH VOLTRON I NEED TO SPEAK TO SOMEONE ABOUT IT  
> ONLY ONE OF MY FRIENDS WATCHES IT


	26. proclaim your undying love to him just before you get on the plane then quickly take your leave so he cant reply

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HAPPY BIRTHDAY CHRIS GIACOMETTI  
> also happy valentine's day~~~  
> okay so i updated pretty quickly but the quality is shit oooops  
> ALSO: so many people watch voltron i am blessed i talked to so many people and they're awesome  
> IF YOU WANT TO MESSAGE ME, TALK TO ME ON TUMBLR i'm bookybookworm OR INSTAGRAM (the faultin0urfandom) OR KIK (bookybookworm. (with a fullstop)) OR SOMETHING

**_‘hogwarts + seung gil’_ **

**KingJJ:** happy birthday chris!!!!

 **chris(py):** Thank you ;)

 **katsudon-yuri:** omg happy birthday… are you doing anything for it

 **vitya:** happy birthday chris~~~ and happy valentines day  <3

 **chris(py):** I’m just celebrating it at home~

 **katsudon-yuri:** vitya

 **katsudon-yuri:** where are you

 **big pile of idiot:** did you lose him

 **big pile of idiot:** happy birthday btw

 **chris(py):** Thank you.

 **vitya:** it’s a secret

 **katsudon-yuri:** what

 **vitya:** shhhhh

**_daddy_ ** _renamed the group **‘sk8er bois ft. valentines and chris’ bday’**_

**daddy:** GUESS WHAT ME AND GUANG ARE DOING TODAY

 **pika+chu:** youre going on a date for valentines

 **daddy:** WE’RE GOING ON A DATE FOR VALENTINES

 **daddy:** phichit why

 **pika+chu:** everyone is going on dates……. victor and yuuri,

 **pika+chu:** you and guang hong

 **pika+chu:** ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) and ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

 **KingJJ:** who??

 **katsudon-yuri:** you seriously censored their names with lenny faces

 **katsudon-yuri:** why are we friends

 **miniminami:** who are they :?

 **pika+chu:** it’s a seeeecreetttt

 **vitya:** are they even going on a date

 **katsudon-yuri:** I HOPE SO

 **pika+chu:** anyway, i am going to stay at home

 **pika+chu:** saving my money so i can buy discounted chocolate

 **pika+chu:** playing the valentines dlc

 **guay-hong:** yeah but we all know what you really want to do

 **liondelaiglesia:** ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

 **liondelaiglesia:** ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

 **liondelaiglesia:** ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

 **pika+chu:** BYE

 **KingJJ:** also why hasn’t yuri been online in ages

 **katsudon-yuri:** i have?

 **katsudon-yuri:** oh you mean yurio

 **thebetteryuri:** stop talking about me

 **pika+chu:** woah

 

**_‘i neED ANSWERS’_ **

**vitya:** so…….yurio

 **vitya:** are you and otabek going on another date for valentines

 **thebetteryuri:** um

 **katsudon-yuri:** omg omg have you bought him chocolate

 **thebetteryuri:** no wtf

 **thebetteryuri:** im not a lovesick girl

 **katsudon-yuri:** yes, youre a lovesick boy

 **vitya:** good one yuuri

 **thebetteryuri:** STOP

 **thebetteryuri:** nothing will happen

 **thebetteryuri:** im leaving in a few days anyway

 **katsudon-yuri:** proclaim your undying love to him just before you get on the plane then quickly take your leave so he cant reply

 **katsudon-yuri:** then he can think about you until the next time you see each other it’ll be so romantic

 **thebetteryuri:** what the fuck is wrong with you

 

_private message from **vitya** to **katsudon-yuri**_

**vitya:** yuuri

 **vitya:** yuuri

 **vitya:** yuuri

 **katsudon-yuri:** yes?

 **vitya:** where are you

 **katsudon-yuri:** in my room, where else

 **vitya:** okay

 **vitya:** go down the hall

 **katsudon-yuri:** what

 **katsudon-yuri:** vitya where are you

 **vitya:** just trust me

 **katsudon-yuri:** okay im in the hall

 **vitya:** im going to show you a picture of the most beautiful man alive

 **katsudon-yuri:** um

 **vitya:** go down the stairs

 **katsudon-yuri:** yes…..

 **vitya:** now turn left

 **vitya:** and go in the room

 **katsudon-yuri:** why am i in the bathroom

 **vitya:** take a couple steps forward

 **vitya:** and turn left

 **katsudon-yuri:** it’s the mirror? oh

 **katsudon-yuri:** VITYA

 **vitya:** it’s the most beautiful man!!!!!

 **katsudon-yuri:** i’m

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> haha this chapter was really bad, sorry  
> happy valentines day, hope you have a nice day hanging out with your significant other, your family, yourself, whatever (personally i have a hot date with some doughnuts)


	27. abundance of otayuri

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay, so the otayuri parts of this chapter were suggested by the incredible all-the-good-names-are-gone on tumblr!! we talked for quite a bit about this idea, and i'm condsidering writing a normal fanfic (like the 2.5 hours one) explaining everything in more detail (as well as the v day date? maybe?)  
> also the picture of the minion (don't ask until you've read it hhaa) was sent to me by gummigoo on tumblr (though i haven't told her i'm putting it in the fic lol) it was from an instagram post by @yourtypicalgiggle  
> OH MY GOD SORRY FOR THE LONG AN

**_‘i neED ANSWERS’_ **

**vitya:** yurioooo

 **vitya:** it’s almost your last day in Almaty, do you not have anything to say to otabek

 **thebetteryuri:** umm no why would i

 **katsudon-yuri:** denial isn’t just a river in egypt yuri

 **thebetteryuri:** SHU t up

 **thebetteryuri:** im not going to tell him anything

 **vitya:** why notttt it’ll give you less pain

 **thebetteryuri:** iM not jn plain

 **thebetteryuri:** pain

 **katsudon-yuri:** uh huh sure

 **katsudon-yuri:** so what will you be doing today

 **thebetteryuri:** otabek’s taking me somewhere tonight

 **vitya:** ooooooooooooh h h where

 **thebetteryuri:** idk hes being secretive

 **vitya:** ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

 **thebetteryuri:** IM 15 WTF DO YOU MEAN BY THAT

 **katsudon-yuri:** shush vitya

 **katsudon-yuri:** but please yuri its not nice to see you pining

 **thebetteryuri:** im not piNING

 **thebetteryuri:** im leaving

 **vitya:** tell us what happens!!!

 **thebetteryuri:** ok

 

**_‘sk8er bois ft. valentines and chris’ bday’_ **

**daddy:** i need to change my name on here

 **daddy:** or else my sister is going to wonder why i’m called daddy

**_daddy_ ** _changed to **liondelaiglesia**_

**big pile of idiot:** same

**_big pile of idiot_ ** _changed to **guay-hong**_

**pika+chu:** thanK GOD

 **pika+chu:** guang-hong’s was okay but whenever leo spoke i had a mini existential crisis

 **liondelaiglesia:** ;)

 **miniminami:** im still confused about that

 **pika+chu:** you realllly don’t need to know

 **miniminami:** aw ok

 **katsudon-yuri:** u dodged a bullet there hah

 **liondelaiglesia:** [kill_me.jpg](https://68.media.tumblr.com/3438d8700a3d9248485fd0189622a3d8/tumblr_olhaymMwHP1v9ar1no1_500.jpg)

 **pika+chu:** well that’s ruined les miserables for me

 **KingJJ:** minion mignon

**_guay-hong_ ** _removed **KingJJ** from the group_

**vitya:** omg

**_pika+chu_ ** _added **KingJJ**_

**KingJJ:**  was that really necessary

 **guay-hong:** you just called a minion _cute_

 **liondelaiglesia:** guang has a deep hatred for minions

 

` _[1:53am Kazakhstan time]_ `

**_‘i neED ANSWERS’_ **

**katsudon-yuri:** yurio, are you still doing that secret thing with otabek

 **vitya:** it’s 2 in the morning there yuuri, i doubt he’s awake

 **katsudon-yuri:** hmm that’s true

 **thebetteryuri:** oh

 **thebetteryuri:** yeah im awake

 **katsudon-yuri:** are you back yet??

 **thebetteryuri:** um yeah

 **vitya:** what happened

 **vitya:** did you confess your love

 **thebetteryuri:** NO

 **thebetteryuri:** otabek took me to this music festival thing

 **katsudon-yuri:** and what did you do

 **thebetteryuri:** he DJs?????????????????????????????????

 **vitya:** wa i t

 **thebetteryuri:** HE DOES IT CASUALLY FOR FUN

 **katsudon-yuri:** aww that’s so cute

 **vitya:** did he dj for you

 **thebetteryuri:** yes

 **thebetteryuri:** well not _for me_

 **thebetteryuri:** but he did it

 **katsudon-yuri:** deTAILS

 **thebetteryuri:** no

 

_private message from **thebetteryuri** to **theotabest**_

**thebetteryuri:** beka are you awake

 **theotabest:** yes, why

 **theotabest:** also I’m literally next door yura, you can come in

 **thebetteryuri:** no it’s fine i can just type

 **thebetteryuri:** i

 **thebetteryuri:** i just wanted to say

 **thebetteryuri:** thanks

 **thebetteryuri:** like these past few days were really fun and then you took me to that thing today (yesterday?) and it was really good you are a really good dj and um. yeah

 **thebetteryuri:**  beka?

 **thebetteryuri:** otabek?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so yeah please tell me in the comments or on tumblr what you think about me writing a fic (see the beginning notes for details)  
> lol also why isn't beka replying hmmmmmm~~~~  
> (also for those who don't know any french, mignon is pronounced minyon (kinda) so it sounds a bit like minion hahahahaha ok)


	28. fan account

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i have appeared  
> it's been, what, a month?  
> um  
> well  
> i can explain? i think  
> basically it's my gcse year and i'm extremely pressured and SO MUCH WORK  
> so sometimes i'm too tired or i don't even have any time to open ao3 and write? idk  
> but i've got some time (barely any haha) so i wrote this  
> and i may write another companion fic about the DJing thing (that i wrote in the an last time)  
> ...  
> i missed yuri's birthday i am so angry  
> maybe birthdays don't exist anymore  
> yeah that'll work  
> long note over--

**_‘sk8er bois ft. valentines and chris’ bday’_ **

**chris(py):** It’s not valentines, nor is it my birthday anymore… Perhaps we should change the group title?

 **liondelaiglesia:** ur rite

 **_liondelaiglesia_ ** _renamed the group **‘sk9er bois’**_

 **guay-hong:** sk9er

 **liondelaiglesia:** we’re sk8er but better

 **pika+chu:** skniner bois

 **pika+chu:** skeighter bois is better

 **liondelaiglesia:** ok vriska

 **_pika+chu_ ** _renamed the group **‘sk8er bois with an eight’**_

 **miniminami:** eight looks like a fake word

 **katsudon-yuri:** aha it doess

 **pika+chu:** ALSO ALSO ALSO ALSO

 **vitya:** WHAT

 **pika+chu:** look what I founddddddddddddddd

 **pika+chu:** capture_2.jpg

 **pika+chu:** otabek’s got a fan weBSITE OF HIM

 **thebetteryuri:** they’re called… otabek’s teddybears?

 

**_‘i neED ANSWERS’_ **

**vitya:** after literal years of not talking on the group chat, you suddenly talk when otabek is mentioned

 **vitya:** hmmmmmmm ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

 **katsudon-yuri:** vitya we already know about yurio’s crush

 **thebetteryuri:** uh

 

**_‘sk8er bois with an eight’_ **

**KingJJ:** haha we all have our fans~

 **theotabest:** um who are they

 **pika+chu:** omg

 **pika+chu:** you don’t know about them???????

 **theotabest:** no

 **pika+chu:** IM SENDING A LINK

 **pika+chu:** otabeks-teddybears.kz

 **theotabest:** thanks..

 **vitya:** hmm.. some of the stuff on there is……..

 **guay-hong:** hahahaaaa its hilarious

 **miniminami:** wow, there are a lot of screaming people on here

 **theotabest:** …theres a picture of me when i was younger

 **theotabest:** how did they get that

 **pika+chu:** wow don’t scroll too far down, things get a little…

 **theotabest:** oh wow okay

 **theotabest:** yes i scrolled down too far

 **guay-hong:** rip otabek

 **thebetteryuri:** they’re pretty sad

 **thebetteryuri:** all theyre doing with their life is _fangirling_

 **pika+chu:** low blow

 **vitya:** also don’t you have a fan group? yuri’s angels

 **theotabest:** they’re basically the same kinds of people

 **thebetteryuri:** uhhhh

 **theotabest:** haha

 

**_‘i neED ANSWERS’_ **

**katsudon-yuri:** no offence yuri but you and otabek are the cutest couple

 **thebetteryuri:** ….why would i be offended

 **katsudon-yuri:** hmm true

 **thebetteryuri:** but

 **thebetteryuri:** thanks i guess

 **katsudon-yuri:** omg yuri youre not denying it

 **vitya:** EXCUSE YOU YUURI

 **vitya:** i thought we were the cutest couple

 **katsudon-yuri:** …

 **thebetteryuri:** oh um also

 **thebetteryuri:** hmm

 **thebetteryuri:** actually never mind

 **vitya:** yuri, is something wrong?

 **thebetteryuri:** no no no everything’s fine

 **thebetteryuri:** better than fine?

 **katsudon-yuri:** yuri…

 **thebetteryuri:** shit

 **thebetteryuri:** well

 **thebetteryuri:** uh

 **thebetteryuri:** me and otabek are

 **thebetteryuri:** together

 **thebetteryuri:** GOOD NIGHT

 **_thebetteryuri_ ** _left the group_

 **katsudon-yuri:** fhaksgdLFAKSJDHSJK

 **vitya:** YURIO GET BACK HERE THIS INSTANT

 

**_‘sk8er bois with an eight’_ **

**pika+chu:** where did everyone go

 **liondelaiglesia:**  beats me

 

_private message from **theotabest** to  **thebetteryuri**_

**theotabest:** good night yura

 **thebetteryuri:** night, beka

 **thebetteryuri:** <3

 **theotabest:** 3 >

 **theotabest:** wait

 **thebetteryuri:** ahaha

 **theotabest:** Ɛ >

 **thebetteryuri:** what the hell

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the otabek fan account thing was suggested to me by problematic-garbage on tumblr (who inadvertently inspired me to start writing this again thanks) and the name Otabek's Teddybears was given by rhetorical-procrastinator (i think)


	29. victor nikiforov/katsuki yuuri fanfiction

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I KNOW I'M POSTING ANOTHER CHAPTER A MERE DAY AFTER POSTING!!! It's like the early days of this fanfic hahaa  
> the idea for most of this chapter goes to anon on tumblr!! I kind of changed it a bit, oooops (it was from absolute years ago so idk if they remember it haha)

**_‘sk8er bois with an eight’_ **

**guay-hong:** i think something is up with phichit

 **guay-hong:** he called me at 5am his time

 **guay-hong:** crying

 **guay-hong:** and just unintelligibly muttering???

 **miniminami:** omg is he okay?? :o

 **pika+chu:** aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah

 **liondelaiglesia:** uh phichit

 **katsudon-yuri:** … what, have you found a spot on your face or something

 **pika+chu:** nooooo yuuuuri nothing of the sort

 **pika+chu:** my skin is clear like always

 **pika+chu:** optimum conditions for selfies

 **katsudon-yuri:** wow

 **KingJJ:** then what’s up

 **pika+chu:** i cantttttttttt even    say ittttttttt

 **liondelaiglesia:** then don’t

 **pika+chu:** NO I HAVE TO

 **guay-hong:** you’re sending mixed messages

 **pika+chu:** okay so

 **pika+chu:** i was on instagram

 **pika+chu:** ~~stalking~~ browsing

 **pika+chu:** and i saw the best and simultaneously worst thing ever

 **vitya:** ……what was it

 **pika+chu:** omg victor

 **pika+chu:** you don’t even want to know

 **pika+chu:** but i guess you do??

 **katsudon-yuri:** stop stalling for dramatic effect phichit, we all know you could say it in ten words or less

 **pika+chu:** i

 **pika+chu:** okay

 **pika+chu:** i saw a link for victuuri fanfiction

 **chris(py):** ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

 **guay-hong:** ah chris, always here with the lenny face at opportune moments

 **chris(py):** You’re welcome.

 **katsudon-yuri:** okay let me get this straight

 **pika+chu:** alas, the only thing i cannot do is, be straight

 **katsudon-yuri:** wait so

 **katsudon-yuri:** you’re saying that

 **katsudon-yuri:** you’re reading fanfiction of vitya and me???

 

_private message from **vitya** to **pika+chu**_

**vitya:** send me the link

 **pika+chu:** omg

 **pika+chu:** are you sure

 **vitya:** yes

 **pika+chu:** that’s pretty meta

 **pika+chu:** also awkward???

 **vitya:** please

 **pika+chu:** damn okay

 **pika+chu:** [here ya go](https://archiveofourown.org/tags/Katsuki%20Yuuri*s*Victor%20Nikiforov/works)

 **vitya:** oh my

 **vitya:** so many works

 **pika+chu:** don’t try to read all of them unless you like having sleepless nights

 **vitya:** you have experience in this

 **pika+chu:** oh boy, do i

 **vitya:** also don’t tell yuuri i’m reading them

 **pika+chu:** …

 

**_pika+chu_ ** _added **katsudon-yuri**_

**_pika+chu_ ** _added **vitya**_

**_pika+chu_ ** _renamed the group **‘phichit, professional snake’**_

**pika+chu:** YUURI, VICTOR’S READING FANFICTION ABOUT YOU TWO

 **katsudon-yuri:** what.

 

_private message from **pika+chu** to **vitya**_

**pika+chu:** too late

 **vitya:** ahjfkl;shdgkfGSF;LJ

 

**_‘phichit, professional snake’_ **

**vitya:** whyyyyyyyyyyyy

 **pika+chu:** yuuri’s my best friend, victor. he deserves to know

 **katsudon-yuri:** uh

 **vitya:** yuuri don’t be mad :(

 **katsudon-yuri:** why…

 **katsudon-yuri:** why would i be mad

 **vitya:** um, because im reading fanfic about us

 **katsudon-yuri:** well

 **katsudon-yuri:** i mean

 **katsudon-yuri:** it’s okay

 **pika+chu:** whaaaaaaat

 **pika+chu:** dam i thought i was being snakey

 **vitya:** you were, actually

 **katsudon-yuri:** it’s okay, i mean, we are together, right

 **vitya:** aw yuuri youre the best

 **pika+chu:** wow i did not see this coming

 **pika+chu:** so, victor, have you read any yet

 **vitya:** aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah

 **pika+chu:** my sentiments exactly

 **katsudon-yuri:** oh dear

 

_private message from **katsudon-yuri** to **thebetteryuri**_

**katsudon-yuri:** yuri, please tell me what you meant about otabek

 **thebetteryuri:** oh

 **katsudon-yuri:** you’re together? you mean romantically?

 **thebetteryuri:** ummmm I guess

 **thebetteryuri:** yeah

 **katsudon-yuri:** what happened

 **thebetteryuri:** idk, we were texting then he didn’t reply for a long time so i went into his room and he was there and we talked for a bit and then

 **thebetteryuri:** we

 **thebetteryuri:**  uhhh

 **katsudon-yuri:** i understand :)))) youre dating now, eh???

 **thebetteryuri:** uh yeah

 **katsudon-yuri:** ahh this is great

 **thebetteryuri:** let’s stop talking about this now

 **katsudon-yuri:** okay ;)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> another companion fic is being written right now about the DJ thing, and what happened back in chapter 27 (when otabek didn't reply to yuri's message) it's kind of explained in this chapter too, but....... DETAILS AMIRITE  
> sorry for the confusion, i noticed a few people asking what had happened  
> all good things ;)  
> ps. i am a professional snake, just like phichit. (also a professional kinkshamer)  
> pps. [really shitty bonus](https://bookybookworm.tumblr.com/post/158314150640/bonus-to-chapter-29-x-i-wrote-that-on-my)


	30. languages

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 1\. i'm sorry for not updating i am a horrible person, but i have exams really soon so
> 
> 2\. everyone is speaking in their native languages but the thing is  
> i'm only fluent in english (and gujarati and latin but no one is gujarati or roman so...) and am partially fluent in spanish. Also I know a tiny bit of japanese but only hiragana :/  
> so im sorry if i fucked everything up  
> I wrote the spanish, japanese, and french (i know a little french too dw guys)  
> [gummigoo](http://gummigoo.tumblr.com/) (my fanfic advisor) wrote the korean, chinese, and kind of the russian but tbh it was mostly google translate (she's good at korean and chinese so it's okay lmao)  
> i'll post a link to the translations in the end notes (but try to figure it out first haha)

**_‘sk8er bois with an eight’_ **

**thebetteryuri:** Когда я вернусь домой, я убью тебя. 

 **vitya:** Юрий… 

 **vitya:** Не говори так с отцом .

 **pika+chu:** lol guys you’re speaking Russian, no one can understand you

 **vitya:** Прости 

 **vitya:** lol

 **seung gil lee:** oh we’re using native languages? 좋은데

 **pika+chu:** AGH I DON’T KNOW KOREAN

 **katsudon-yuri:** でも あなた は あらゆる 言語 を 知って いる 

 **pika+chu:** not korean

 **liondelaiglesia:** ¡este es divertido! 

 **liondelaiglesia:** quiero confundir los todos (y los lectores también) 

 **pika+chu:** evil leo

 **miniminami:**  私 は これ が 好き   

 **KingJJ:** c’est un désordre

 **chris(py):** Je suis d’accord. 

 **pika+chu:** noooooo don’t say that

 **guay-hong:** what is going on? leo is laughing manically

 **liondelaiglesia:** estamos hablando en nuestros idiomas nativos 

 **guay-hong:** 我不明白  :(((

 **pika+chu:** tough break

 **katsudon-yuri:** ユリ あなた が これ を 始めた 

 **seung gil lee:**  @ phichit: 자기야~ 보고싶어

 **seung gil lee:** 사랑해

 **pika+chu:** what does that mean???????? I cant even google :(((

 **liondelaiglesia:** guang, habla conmigo

 **guay-hong:** 我爱你爸爸

 **liondelaiglesia:** ¿qué?

 **guay-hong:** ;)

 **pika+chu:** im dead im dying kill me

 **pika+chu:** WHO KNEW

 

_private message from **guay-hong** to **pika+chu**_

**guay-hong:** if you tell him what i said then our friendship is over

 **pika+chu:** okay kinky-hong ji

 

**_‘sk8er bois with an eight’_ **

**vitya:** я люблю тебя yuuri

 **katsudon-yuri:** 大 好き だ よ

 **vitya:** <3

 **katsudon-yuri:** <3

 **thebetteryuri:** пока

 **pika+chu:** sweetness aside, what did seung gil mean

 **KingJJ:** je ne sais pas

 **liondelaiglesia:** no sé

 **seung gil lee:** :))

 **seung gil lee:** 왕자~

 **pika+chu:** i’m-

 **chris(py):** S’il vous plaît, pouvons-nous cesser?

 **vitya:** Зачем

 **pika+chu:** YES WHY

 **guay-hong:** because we have to rely on phichit for translations

 **guay-hong:** and to be honest

 **guay-hong:** I don’t trust him

 **pika+chu:** woah my friend

 **liondelaiglesia:** anyway why aren’t you speaking in thai?

 **pika+chu:** because neither the writer nor her friend helping her with this can speak it and they don’t want to use google translate because they’ll probably say the wrong thing and offend someone

 **liondelaiglesia:** fair

**_‘i neED ANSWERS’_ **

**_vitya_ ** _added **thebetteryuri**_

 **katsudon-yuri:** vitya why

 **vitya:** i neED ANSWERS

 **vitya:** as the chat title says

 **katsudon-yuri:** i already told you what yurio told me

 **thebetteryuri:** WHY

 **thebetteryuri:** but yeah isn’t that enough

 **vitya:** details please

 **thebetteryuri:** no thanks old man

 **vitya:** I'M NOT OLD

 **katsudon-yuri:** yes, he's a toddler

 **vitya:** im pouting

 **thebetteryuri:** like a toddler

 

**_‘sk8er bois with an eight’_ **

**pika+chu:** @ whoever made this app

 **pika+chu:** why

 **miniminami:** what do you mean?

 **pika+chu:** I CANT COPY PASTE GOOGLE TRANSLATE WHAT SEUNG GIL SAID

 **pika+chu:** that's it im learning korean

 **seung gil lee:** why are you so hung up about it

 **katsudon-yuri:** /dies

 **chris(py):** ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

 **pika+chu:** what did i do to deserve this ABUSE

 **thebetteryuri:** created this fucking chat

 

_private message from **liondelaiglesia** to **thebetteryuri**_

**liondelaiglesia:** oohHHHhHhHHHHHHHHHHHhhhhhh

 **thebetteryuri:** no

 **thebetteryuri:** leave

 **thebetteryuri:** at once

 **liondelaiglesia:** im getting diabetes

 **thebetteryuri:** what? why

 **liondelaiglesia:** SO MUCH SALT

 **thebetteryuri:** you aSS

 **thebetteryuri:** ITS HIGH BLOOD PRESSURE NOT DIABETES

 **thebetteryuri:** DIABETES IS SUGAR

 **liondelaiglesia:** this is why im getting diabetes

 **liondelaiglesia:** shit i mean high blood pressure

`thebetteryuri blocked your number! they won’t be able to see your texts until they unblock you :)`

**liondelaiglesia:** wow

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> im sorry this is half crack half shitty plot i dont even know  
> shoutout again to [gummigoo](http://gummigoo.tumblr.com/) because she helped me loads thx thx  
> [here are the translations](https://bookybookworm.tumblr.com/post/159341241080/translations-for-the-chapter-30-of-sk8er-bois) (pls tell me if we screwed anything up)  
> ALSO READ MY OTAYURI FIC EXPLAINING HOW THEY GOT TOGETHER [HERE](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10533969/chapters/23257290)  
> that is all.


	31. with this chapter i have broken the fourth wall into little pieces

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay so the date is 14th April and I go back to school on the 19th  
> and then i have two and a half weeks of hardcore revision, then a week of study period (MORE REVISION), and THEN MY FREAKING GCSES so long story short, this chapter may not be the last one for a while  
> until at least 20th June, when my exams are finished, but then i'm going on NCS for a month so won't have my laptop so i can try to write on my phone or whatever but no promises  
> i'll probably find an excuse to update this over exam time tbh so don't give up on this haha  
> i have so much planned my phone is filled with bullet points

**_‘sk8er bois with an eight’_ **

**liondelaiglesia:** yuri,,,,,,,,,,,

 **liondelaiglesia:** russian yuri i mean

 **liondelaiglesia:** yuri,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

 **liondelaiglesia:** explain this,,,,,

 **thebetteryuri:** explain what

 **liondelaiglesia:** hold your horses,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

 **liondelaiglesia:** [img4594.jpg](https://68.media.tumblr.com/d28860c815552ebf2b6cdaeaa861ab52/tumblr_oocx58mloy1w3f9xao1_1280.png)

 **liondelaiglesia:** [img4595.jpg](https://68.media.tumblr.com/05caea4042e8ceb1f0c2d87f554a531b/tumblr_oocx58mloy1w3f9xao2_1280.png)

 **liondelaiglesia:** [img4596.jpg](https://68.media.tumblr.com/2492865667bcf2ad7e91c48f482ef646/tumblr_oocx58mloy1w3f9xao3_1280.png)

 **liondelaiglesia:** [img4597.jpg](https://68.media.tumblr.com/f46b4f0ff4c9f217b49112b807536a73/tumblr_oocx58mloy1w3f9xao4_1280.png)

 **liondelaiglesia:** [img4598.jpg](https://68.media.tumblr.com/cafc7faa568e31020bf4e50d078f2f99/tumblr_oocx58mloy1w3f9xao6_1280.png)

 **liondelaiglesia:** [img4599.jpg](https://68.media.tumblr.com/70dcd336014889fa271c6c07c2909436/tumblr_oocx58mloy1w3f9xao5_1280.png)

 **thebetteryuri:** oh

 **vitya:** my pure innocent yuri

 **vitya:** performing this

 **thebetteryuri:** IM NOT PURE OR INNOCENT

 **vitya:** this _erotic_

 **guay-hong:** ohmygsd im dying

 **vitya:** _erotic, striP TEASE_

 **pika+chu:** homy shot

 **thebetteryuri:** WHAT TH EFUCK OLD MAN I WASN’T STRIPPING

 **vitya:** _then whaT WERE YOU DOING_

 **thebetteryuri:** skating???????????? on the ice????????????????????????????

 **vitya:** a fifteen year old BOY

 **thebetteryuri:** im 16 now

 **vitya:** you were 15 then

 **katsudon-yuri:** vitya i think that yuri can skate to whatever he wants

 **vitya:** et tu brute

 **pika+chu:** still, yuri that dance was very…..

 **pika+chu:** uhh

 **pika+chu:** you had eyeliner like _georgi’s_

 **thebetteryuri:** i know he did it for me

 **liondelaiglesia:** aahaha omg

 **katsudon-yuri:** yuri did you choose the music

 **thebetteryuri:** no otabek chose it for me

 **pika+chu:** insert lenny face

 **pika+chu:** someone put the lenny face

 **chris(py):** ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

 **pika+chu:** niCE

 **KingJJ:** wait… but when even was this? in the grand prix exhibition??

 **miniminami:** well we don’t really know because this fic was written two days before episode 12 came out and so we’re in the void between episode 11 and 12 and this is just a timeless fic

 **miniminami:** and technically the exhibition skate hasn’t happened yet so we shouldn’t be seeing these photos but welp, here they are

 **seung gil lee:** fuck canon lmao

 **miniminami:** [lmao](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vtkGtXtDlQA)

 **KingJJ:** what the heck

 **guay-hong:** moving on

 **liondelaiglesia:** how’s it going in kazakhstan yuri ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

 **guay-hong:**  (☞ﾟ∀ﾟ)☞

 **liondelaiglesia:** ☜(ﾟ∀ﾟ☜)

 **thebetteryuri:** why the lenny face

 **pika+chu:** bc we wanna knowwww ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

 **thebetteryuri:** it’s fine????? im leaving tomorrow?

 **liondelaiglesia:**   just fine? :))))))

 **thebetteryuri:** yes???

 

**_‘i neED ANSWERS’_ **

**vitya:** yuri my pure sweet innocent summer child

 **katsudon-yuri:** vitya…

 **thebetteryuri:** i am one second away from flying back and KNEEING YOU IN THE BALLS

 **vitya:** but then you’d have less time to spend with otabek

 **katsudon-yuri:** oh my god

 

_private message from **theotabest** to **thebetteryuri**_

**theotabest:** yura

 **thebetteryuri:** bake

 **thebetteryuri:** ufck i mean bakea

 **thebetteryuri:** fheqifGYFEADS

 **thebetteryuri:** neaka

 **thebetteryuri:** kaeba

 **theotabest:** take your time

 **thebetteryuri:** my fingers are beteying me

 **thebetteryuri:** betreaying

 **thebetteryuri:** fcoounhfgoeuinadbiftwaqldl

 **thebetteryuri:** anyway what did you want to ay

 **thebetteryuri:** a=say

 **theotabest:** do you think we should tell everyone about our

 **theotabest:** relationship

 **thebetteryuri:** neah

 **theotabest:** ?????

 **theotabest:** neah??

 **thebetteryuri:** ff i mean yeah

 **thebetteryuri:** maybe you should do the typig

 

**_‘sk8er bois with an eight’_ **

**theotabest:** me and yuri are dating

 **chris(py):** ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

 **KingJJ:** wow,,,,, I definitely did not see this coming,,,,

 **pika+chu:** what the frick frack diddly dack patty whack snick snack chick chack heck

 **thebetteryuri:** lma s o bunt

 **guay-hong:** im freaking out but what did you say yuri

 **thebetteryuri:** lmao so blunt******

 **theotabest:** hes having trouble typing

 **liondelaiglesia:** im so happ

 **liondelaiglesia:** [we should play this at their wedding](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dQw4w9WgXcQ)

 **vitya:** WEDDING???

 **pika+chu:** omg so sweet

 **pika+chu:** such a beautiful song

 **KingJJ:** warms my heart

 **miniminami:** otabek and yuri are getting married? and aww those lyrics are so cute

 **guay-hong:** i have a feeling that minami isn’t being ironic

 **miniminami:** why would i be ironic

 **thebetteryuri:** OKAY ONE

 **thebetteryuri:** ME AND OTABEK ARENT GETTING MARRIED

 **vitya:** yet

 **thebetteryuri:** TWO

 **thebetteryuri:** SHUT THE FUCK UP OLD MAN

 **thebetteryuri:** TREE

 **KingJJ:** tree

 **thebetteryuri:** YOU KNOW WHSIDSGERJ;WOHSU;B

 **katsudon-yuri:** yurio? what happened?

 **theotabest:** i took away his phone; he almost threw it against the wall

 **guay-hong:** otabek uses semicolons pass it on

 **pika+chu:** ALSO

 **pika+chu:** (otabek took away yuri’s phone we know who the top is here)

 **katsudon-yuri:** phichit no

 **chris(py):** ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

 **seung gil lee:** hey do you remember when this fic was actually funny

 **chris(py):** You weren’t even in this fic back then.

 **seung gil lee:** i was there in spirit everyone kept talking about me

 **pika+chu:** how dO YOU KNOW SEUNG GIL

 **sarararasputin:** lol

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yurio's typos are 100% authentic; ask my friends it usually takes me ~5 tries to get a word right (i also use semicolons in daily life like otabek im sorry)  
> please read the beginning notes pls  
> fun fact: this chapter is exactly 666 words


	32. seungchuchu but without the seung. so just chuchu i guess

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> quickly typing out this chapter even though i'm supposed to be revising oooops  
> update: seriously don't expect more chapters (so if i do post any it'll be a nice surprise lol) i feel like i'm drowning in exams and i'm really stressed about a-levels next year becAUSE MY TEACHER IS BEING SHITTY

**_‘sk8er bois with an eight’_ **

**liondelaiglesia:** so moving along

**liondelaiglesia:** seriously how did sara comment she’s not even in this chat

**guay-hong:** she broke the fourth wall

**liondelaiglesia:** but this is real life it’s impossible to break the fourth wall

**katsudon-yuri:** that’s what you think

**vitya:** [oooh](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GRWbIoIR04c)

**katsudon-yuri:** vityaaa whyyyy

**vitya:** aw you know you love me

**katsudon-yuri:** yeah i do  <3

**vitya:** <333333

**vitya:** but i bet i love you more

**katsudon-yuri:** hah that’s impossible i love you too much

**vitya:** yuuri

**vitya:** nothing is impossible when it comes to our love

**katsudon-yuri:** youre right im sorry vitya

**thebetteryuri:** make it stop

**pika+chu:** AH YOU JUST REMINDED ME

**_pika+chu_ ** _renamed the group to **‘otayuri is canon’**_

**chris(py):** ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

**pika+chu:** my sentiments exactly chris

**guay-hong:** i’m feeling déjà vu

**guay-hong:** omg it autocorrected with the accents this is not okay

**guay-hong:** anyway

**guay-hong:** [screenshot_93.jpg](https://68.media.tumblr.com/228f623ee8755a725cd0417031748992/tumblr_oovhr1j0321v9ar1no1_540.png)

**vitya:** it’s because we love each other so much

**pika+chu:** or maybe it’s because you reuse your flirting techniques

**pika+chu:** step up ur games victuuri

**KingJJ:** oh and you know all about flirting, do you

**liondelaiglesia:** well of course ,

**liondelaiglesia:** he’s had a lot of practice ,

**pika+chu:** LEO DON’T YOU DSARE

**katsudon-yuri:** wait i see where youre going with this

**_pika+chu_ ** _removed **liondelaiglesia**_

**_pika+chu_ ** _removed **katsudon-yuri**_

**pika+chu:** no

**pika+chu:** I SEE YOU TYPING GUANG HONG JI

**guay-hong:** is this the fact that phichit practises flirting with that certain someone ;) in front of his mirror

**pika+chu:** DON’T SAY A WORD OR I WILL REMOVE YOU TOO

**guay-hong:** too late

**pika+chu:** I WILL END YOU

**pika+chu:** CURSE YOU AND YOUR FAST TYPING

**miniminami:** wait who is this certain someone

**KingJJ:** I think I know who it is

**chris(py):** Most of us do.

**pika+chu:** hdsgdgshgshdhdhhshshsdgslkjdshd

 

_private message from **liondelaiglesia** to **pika+chu**_

**liondelaiglesia:** im looking over guang’s shoulder rn and

**liondelaiglesia:** will you confess to seung gil

**pika+chu:** fffffff leo no

**pika+chu:** seung gil doesn’t even know i exist

**liondelaiglesia:**  no it's just that youre too awkward

**liondelaiglesia:** and you're scarily attached to your phone

**liondelaiglesia:** i'm pretty sure sg will find that weird

**liondelaiglesia:** i mean i find it pretty weird

**pika+chu:** wow thanks

**liondelaiglesia:** whenever you need friendly advice im here for you

**pika+chu:** _wow thanks_

 

**_‘otayuri is canon’_ **

**miniminami:** seriously, who is it? i don’t know T_T

**KingJJ:** aw minami so pure

**miniminami:** (*ﾟ∀ﾟ*)

**_pika+chu_ ** _added **liondelaiglesia**_

**_pika+chu_ ** _added **katsudon-yuri**_

**katsudon-yuri:** what did we miss

**vitya:** phichit is about to proclaim his undying love to the group chat

**pika+chu:** no

 

_private message from **guay-hong** to **liondelaiglesia**_

**guay-hong:** we need a plan

**liondelaiglesia:** guang you’re literally sitting on top of me why are you pming me

**guay-hong:** because it’s easier

**guay-hong:** also if anyone saw your message out of context it would look really weird

**liondelaiglesia:** guang we are weird

**guay-hong:** ANYWAY

**guay-hong:** we need a plan to get phiphi and seung gil together

**liondelaiglesia:** okay, well

**liondelaiglesia:** let’s think…

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> lmao this took half an hour to write so it's quite short oops  
> yes i take really long to write chapters ok  
> i stole my friend's nickname for phichit i am the name thief


	33. twenty one

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> haha so im timing this so i post at midnight in bangkok... it's 6pm in england but phichit's birthday in thailand!!!!!  
> i keep on updating which is good for you guys i guess but BAD FOR ME BECAUSE MY SPANISH ORAL EXAM IS SOON  
> also im really ill and i might have to have surgery nice

_private message from **seung gil lee** to **pika+chu**_

`[00:00]`

**seung gil lee:** happy birthday phichit

**pika+chu:** OMG SEUNG GIL THANK YOU

**seung gil lee:** lol no problem

 

_private message from **katsudon-yuri** to **pika+chu**_

`[00:02]`

**katsudon-yuri:** PHICHIT YOU’RE 21!!! Happy birthday aaah you’re an adult now ;)) what a milestone

**pika+chu:** THANKS YUURI

**katsudon-yuri:** was i the first person to wish you happy birthday lol I set an alarm

**pika+chu:** ACTUALLY

**pika+chu:** GUESS WHA

**katsudon-yuri:** what

**pika+chu:** SEUNG GIL LEE MESSAGED ME HAPPY BIRTHDAY BEFORE YOU

**katsudon-yuri:** so id be offended but

**katsudon-yuri:** your boyfriend personally woke up and sent you a birthday message wow

**pika+chu:** he's not my boyfriend

**pika+chu:**  but yuuri im freaking out aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaag

**_pika+chu_ ** _called **katsudon-yuri** at 00:03_

_end call at 00:52_

**pika+chu:** okay but was singing happy birthday to me in japanese, thai _and_ english necessary

**katsudon-yuri:** yes

**pika+chu:** that was the best birthday present ever

**pika+chu:** seung gil texting me I mean

**katsudon-yuri:**  you're so in love

 

**_‘otayuri is canon’_ **

**miniminami:** happy birthday phichit!!! :)

**pika+chu:** thanks minamiiii

**guay-hong:** phichit youre so old

**pika+chu:** gee thanks guang hong

**pika+chu:** way to compliment someone on their birthday

**guay-hong:** I learned from the best

**guay-hong:** remember when I turned 16 and you told me that I have responsibilities now

**chris(py):** How is that an insult?

**guay-hong:** NO SIXTEEN YEAR OLD WANTS TO HEAR THAT THEY HAVE RESPONSIBILITIES

**thebetteryuri:** I can confirm

**vitya:** phichit did you get any presents

**pika+chu:** I GOT A NEW PHONE CASE

**liondelaiglesia:** haven’t you got like fifteen now

**pika+chu:** ……………… so what

**pika+chu:** im aiming to have thirty one

**pika+chu:** so i have a new case for each day of the month

**KingJJ:** wow that’s….

**pika+chu:** anyway I also got new skates!!!

**katsudon-yuri:** ooh let’s see

**pika+chu:** img_3213.jpg

**miniminami:** they look so cool!! :o

**vitya:** nice phone case

 

_private message from **seung gil lee** to **sarararasputin**_

**seung gil lee:** help

**seung gil lee:** ive got a crush on someone

**sarararasputin:** on phichit, right?

**seung gil lee:** …how did you know

**sarararasputin:** everyone’s known since the dawn of time gilly

**seung gil lee:** i didn’t know until recently

**sarararasputin:** so oblivious

**sarararasputin:** well? are you going to tell him

**seung gil lee:** lol no

 

**_‘i neED ANSWERS’_ **

**vitya:** i suppose there’s no need for this chat anymore

**vitya:** we have all the answers

**katsudon-yuri:** the end of an era

**thebetteryuri:** …did you know that you’re really sad

**vitya:** i still can’t believe you have a boyfriend yuri

**vitya:** it seems like only yesterday you were ten years old

**katsudon-yuri:** ten year old yurio mustve been cute

**thebetteryuri:** no stop

**thebetteryuri:** why are we talking about this

**vitya:** I MAY HAVE PHOTOS

**thebetteryuri:** no you don’t

**vitya:** I DO

**thebetteryuri:** oh god

**katsudon-yuri:** show me show me show me show me

**thebetteryuri:** im boarding the plane soon

**thebetteryuri:** just you fucking wait

 

**_‘otayuri is canon’_ **

**liondelaiglesia:** guang and i have a plan

**KingJJ:** plan to do what

**guay-hong:** it’s a secret

**KingJJ:** then why are you telling us?

**liondelaiglesia:** just a warning :D

**pika+chu:** i feel like a shiver just ran down my spine

**liondelaiglesia:** _good_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sara and seung gil: gay, like kpop = best friends  
> has anyone read the new chapter for shingeki no kyojin? WHO IS THAT GIRL WITH THE CRUTCHES ( **spoiler** is it pieck???)


	34. new memebers i mean members

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [i'm back bitches](https://68.media.tumblr.com/d139bfd826a42e579f1d52b39eacc70c/tumblr_inline_orqifwnkJQ1u1uybz_540.png)

**_‘otayuri is canon’_ **

**pika+chu:** it feels like i haven’t talked to any of you in over a month

 **guay-hong:** lmao no?? it was just yesterday

 **katsudon-yuri:** i think phichit celebrated too hard on his birthday

 **theotabest:** i just realised the chat name… ;;

 **liondelaiglesia:** you’re right it’s old news now

**_liondelaiglesia_ ** _renamed the group to **‘sk8er bois’**_

**chris(py):** By the way – is Yuri going to wish Victor and Yuuri a happy fathers’ day?

 **thebetteryuri:** STOP THEYRE NOT MY FATHERS

 **katsudon-yuri:** aw yurio im hurt

 **pika+chu:** yeah yurio don’t talk like that to your dad

 **thebetteryuri:** this chat was a mistake

 **pika+chu:** do you mean………………………… a miSKATE

 **pika+chu:** ayyyyy

 **liondelaiglesia:** ayyyyy

 **KingJJ:** …

 **KingJJ:** i can’t believe im younger than you phichit

 

_private message from **guay-hong** to **pika+chu**_

**guay-hong:** wait so today is june 18 th

 **guay-hong:** wasn’t seung gil’s birthday june 6 th

 **pika+chu:** yes? we all wished him happy birthday

 **guay-hong:** did we

 **guay-hong:** I don’t remember that

 **pika+chu:** we did!! and then everyone teased me about my crush

 **guay-hong:** man i do not remember that

 **pika+chu:** well it happened

 **pika+chu:** the fic was updated on june 6 th and everyone wished seung-gil a happy birthday

 **pika+chu:** it really did happen :,(

 

**_‘sk8er bois’_ **

**liondelaiglesia:** wow this ~~fic~~ chat is dead

 **pika+chu:** AND YOU KNOW WHAT A DEAD CHAT NEEDS

 **guay-hong:** what

 **pika+chu:** NEW MEMEBERS

 **pika+chu:** i mean members

 **vitya:** no you don’t

 **pika+chu:** no i don’t

 **katsudon-yuri:** who will you add

 **vitya:** ooh ooh add emil

 **liondelaiglesia:** and also the michele and sara twins

 **chris(py):** I don’t think “the Michele and Sara twins” is grammatically correct.

 **liondelaiglesia:** you’re not grammatically correct

**_pika+chu_ ** _added **sarararasputin**_

**_pika+chu_ ** _added **mickey**_

**_pika+chu_ ** _added **em(a)il**_

**sarararasputin:** sk8er bois…

 **pika+chu:** ah shit that name isn’t valid anymore

 **chris(py):** You’re right. We should kick Sara out.

 **sarararasputin:** no

 **sarararasputin:** i have no idea what this is but i’m staying

 **guay-hong:** what about this

**_guay-hong_ ** _renamed the group to **‘sk8er bois + sara’**_

**sarararasputin:** ok

 **sarararasputin:** i can live with that

 **em(a)il:** wow i didn’t know this was a thing

 **em(a)il:** you all had a chat and we weren’t invited :(

 **seung gil lee:** to be fair there are way too many characters in this fic

 **seung gil lee:** i mean chat

 **sarararasputin:** gilly!!!

 **liondelaiglesia:** _gilly_

 **mickey:** sara why is your name sarararasputin

 **sarararasputin:** ra ra rasputin lover of the russian queen

 **sarararasputin:** aka mila

 **vitya:** oh youre dating mila?

 **sarararasputin:** ;;;)

 **em(a)il:** oh maybe we should add mila too

**_em(a)il_ ** _added **russian queen**_

**thebetteryuri:** ugh no not that old hag

 **russian queen:** excuse me

 **thebetteryuri:**  i meant what i said

 **sarararasputin:** milaaaa

 **russian queen:** saraaaa

 **mickey:** blegghh

 **sarararasputin:** hush

 **katsudon-yuri:** now there are fifteen people in this chat

 **russian queen:** so this was created in december and we’re only added in june???

 **miniminami:** time doesn’t exist in this fic i mean there are only 34 chapters so this has only lasted 34 days

 **chris(py):** He’s right.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is a short and bad chapter but on the plus side i've only got one exam left and after that i'm freeeeeeee kinda  
> i had to do this because fathers' day and also that sara/mila joke was fresh in my mind  
> damn it was such a good pun  
> if i do say so myself


	35. note

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ://

ok what the fuck!! i was rereading my fic to cringe and THEN IT FUCKING STPPED?? wat the he ck 16year old me why why  
like 30 chapters isnt nearly fucking enough  
what rhe f u ck  
it wascringey like thefirsttwo chapters in BUT THEN IT GOT GOOD? AnD OTAYURI WAS REALLY FUCKING PURE WHY DID I STOP?????? hecckkkk  
i really want to continue this blegh  
i might continue this

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [Yuuri.exe Has Shut Down](https://archiveofourown.org/works/10606533) by [Zetal (Rodinia)](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rodinia/pseuds/Zetal)




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